Sterling and Topaz

Competition

2011-04-03T11:55:00.000-05:00

I am a competitive person, but only in certain areas. If I'm in an exercise class of some sort, I would definitely want to do the most, the biggest, the spunkiest version of whatever the step is. That is not to say that I can actually keep that up for more than 10 min but the urge to be the most energetic in the class is still there.
I am NOT competitive in the blog world. I am doing my three blogs (yes, three) strictly for my own pleasure. This means there sometimes are long gaps between posts, I do not always take pictures with my fancy camera to post and I do not count my followers or try to get more.
Same thing with my short stint in the world of YouTube videos. I was amazed at the push for followers, just anybody and everybody. The number of followers you had indicated success and possibly brought deals from companies wanting to use you for advertising. I did a couple of giveaways and you had to be a follower to win, but other than that, I never pushed for followers.
Now, I have a business, an Etsy shop. I hate sales. No, no, I like getting a sale in my shop, but I hate being a salesperson, the business of sales. I hate feeling like I'm competing with other people making bags. I don't want to feel like I have to make better bags than them. I just want to make the best bags I can in fabrics and using designs that I think are attractive. I don't like mentioning my business unless it comes up in easy conversation. I don't give my card out unless it's asked for, usually.
Probably not good for business, but if I'm going to promote, I'll definitely have to grow into it. I do want to be able to give more to the Balama Project (www.balama-project.org). Since I give them 10% of profits, more sales would mean more to give.
If you want to help me give and get a pretty bag or earrings to boot. Go look at Molly Blossom and see if there is something that tickles your fancy.
There, I did it.

Christmas is Coming

2011-03-15T14:11:00.000-05:00

I know you're probably wondering why I titled my post what it is titled. Well... it's true, isn't it? Christmas is coming slowly but surely.

I be you're also wondering what the cute pictures above have to do with my title.

Here's the deal. I have a tradition to uphold and I've got to start now, even 9 months ahead to think of our next great Christmas photo. I'm sharing my process with you. I think that some sort of Christmas card using multiple photos as if they were one would be cute. I have no idea what we would be doing in the photos, probably not kissing, but something.

There you go, that's how my fantastic ideas start. ha! :D

A Wise Woman Builds Her Home

2011-03-12T19:59:00.000-06:00

This is a post taken from the blog A Wise Woman Builds Her Home. I've been pretty stressed out about dealing with my two girls lately and I'm on the search for some pertinent encouragement. I was thinking tonight about what my Dad used to pray over me every night. I Googled the verse and this blog entry was one of the links that came up. It was worth sharing. It's good, but a long and challenging read, so be prepared.

The Bible tells us this about daughters in Psalm 144:12-13,
“That our daughters may be as corner stones, polished after the similitude of a palace: that our garners may be full.”

As corner-stones, polished after the similitude of palace, God desires that our daughters grow up to become strong and beautiful ~ and adorned with all the ornaments belonging to their sex. What are the “ornaments” that the Bible teaches belong to the female sex? Titus 2:4-5 describes them as: soberness, love for family, discretion, purity, excellent housekeeping, goodness, and submission to authority.

That’s a tall order, isn’t it? And the reason that it is so important that our daughters be taught and trained in these areas is because (as the Treasury of David so wisely puts it), “Daughters unite families as corner stones join walls together, and at the same time, they adorn them as polished stones garnishing the structure into which they are builded.”

Daughters are an important part of every family, and it is our duty to teach them how to be a blessing to our families now so that they will understand how to be a blessing to the family they will marry into later on.

Matthew Henry writes, “That our daughters may be as corner stones, polished after the similitude of a palace or temple. By daughters families are united and connected to their mutual strength, as the parts of a building are by the cornerstones; and when they are graceful and beautiful both in body and mind, they are then polished after the similitude of a nice and curious structure. When we see our daughters well established, and stayed with wisdom and discretion, as cornerstones are fastened in the building; when we see them by faith united to Christ, as the chief cornerstone, adorned with the graces of God's Spirit, which are the polishing of that which is naturally rough, and "become women professing godliness"; when we see them purified and consecrated to God as living temples, we think ourselves happy in them.”

So, how are we to go about accomplishing so great a task?

First of all, we must remember that daughters have a great need for love and security.

1. Daughters need to be treated with kindness.

2. Daughters feel loved when we are patient with them.

3. A critical spirit is a destructive thing to a daughter’s spirit ~ it causes her to feel insecure about who she is and what she is able to do.

4. Comparison also causes daughters to feel insecure about themselves. Daughters are in desperate need of acceptance in order to become the polished corner stone of the family that God desires them to be.

5. It’s a mothers job to identify the special needs that her daughter has and help her to overcome or practically accommodate them.

6. Mothers must be careful not attribute motives, nor take offense, lose patience, or take the ridiculous things that daughters do too personally.

7. Mothers must remember that daughters need to be raised in a happy, loving home in order to feel totally secure. No amount of love, compliments or kindness will make up for the fear that is brought into a daughter’s heart by marital strife or divorce.

Secondly, daughters need to be taught to control their emotions.

1. Whining, gossiping and complaining should not be tolerated. Make every effort to train your daughter to be sensible by teaching her how to be thankful, patient and kind as she deals with her every day issues of life.

2. Emotions must be taught to follow and not allowed to lead. The best teacher is example. Make it your goal to be a good example of this so that your daughter can “see” how this is done.

3. Daughters must be taught that they may not use their “hormones” as an excuse for sin!

4. Teach your daughter how to manage her tears. There is a time for tears ~ when they are hurt, when someone they know or see is seriously injured or dies. But crying is not something that should continue on and on ~ they should be short and brief. Even in the case of death of a loved one: there is a time to cry, and there is a time to cease from crying.

5. The same goes for silliness. Giggling and acting giddy is fine at times, but too much of it makes a girl ridiculous.

Thirdly, daughters must be raised to embrace their femininity.

1. Daughters should be taught to be home-centered. They should be encouraged to love working with their hands ~ both in housework and handiwork.

2. Daughters should be encouraged to wear dresses, fix their hair and want to look pretty.

a. However, we must be diligent to encourage them to be MODEST and pretty. The female body is a beautiful creation of God and modesty teaches them that it is a precious thing that must be saved for their future husband (and not the whole world) to enjoy.

b. We also must be careful not to raise our daughters to be too prissy or “primadonas” who only a mother and father is able to tolerate and love :).

3. Daughters must be encouraged to play with toys that will encourage her to home-centered and not bedroom-centered.

4. Daughters must be taught and trained how to respond to the men around them.

a. Daughters have a God given need for male attention. Teach them when they are little how to love and serve Dad, so that Dad will enjoy being around them.

b. Teach your daughter how to respect her Dad and brothers. This is will prepare her to enjoy good success when she is married to her own man later on.

Mothers are the role models for their daughters, and it is important that we realize that we are teaching our daughters every day by the way we live. As Christian mothers, it is vital that we commit ourselves to living as the godly women that we would want our daughters to grow up to become. This is a tall order, but one which is certainly possible as we grow in the grace and knowledge of our loving God.

Another great article by Mrs. Julie Fink @ Lessons for Ladies

Visit her blog and be blessed by her Bible Studies!

From Scratch

2011-01-10T10:47:00.000-06:00

My hubby baked butter cookies from a 1940's recipe yesterday.
Well, the whole process started the day before, but he threw out the whole ball of crumbly dough and, consequently, hours of work.
He tried again a second time yesterday and after making another huge mess and then cleaning it all up, ended up with this...

and this...

and these beauties!

I hate baking and, although he did a great job persevering though the difficulties of a novice baker with a yummy outcome. I felt his pain and I do not aspire to try cookies from scratch any time soon.

White, Fluffy, Bearded Lies

2010-12-15T10:11:00.001-06:00

This blog might be all over the place because I am not doing it while the kids are napping. That means Eden is on the couch talking about whatever crosses her mind, because she MUST be talking CONSTANTLY. This girl does not stop. She's complaining of a tummy ache, but she's not resting or anything like that. NOooooo. Play through it and talk through it. That's her motto.

I am trying to keep Arielle from being bitten because she is pretending to feed Dolce something imaginary from her little chubby fingers and Dolce doesn't like my children. And, of course, by the time I've written a few more sentences, that all will have changed and they'll be doing something else completely.

Onward. A friend of mine asked me a couple weeks back what my views on Santa were. I told her the short version because there were babies fussing and toddlers waiting for a moment of Mommy distraction to take advantage of. Since then the deliberate decisions we as a family make about this holiday have continued to be brought to my attention.

First, let me give you some background on how I was raised. My parents treated Santa almost like the plague, along with Mary Poppins and the Smurfs. I'm sure I was aware of him, but we never did pictures with Santa (that's right, there's not a single picture of me crying in Mall Santa's lap in my baby albums). We didn't read books about him. My dad might have done some readings of The Night Before Christmas when I got older for the sake of good literature and classic poetry (loves of his), but that was the exception. We had no likenesses of Santa in our home except a small figurine of him kneeling at the manger. I don't remember what I thought about other kids and their views of Santa. I don't remember feeling the need to correct them, although that would have been JUST like me to do so. I don't remember ever wanting to join the long line of fussy children to sit on Santa's lap. I don't remember feeling left out because I wasn't writing letters to the North Pole.

Fast forward to today. I have two little girls and this is the first Christmas where I'm really having to live out the path I assumed I would take regarding Santa and his hold on this holiday.

In short, I have made a promise to my children never to deceive them. And yes, I have thought about all that that entails. I do my very best to stay truthful about everything. That means if Eden wants another cookie and I don't want her to have one, I don't look in the box and say "uh oh, they're all gone." I say, "no ma'am, you don't need another cookie." I can't think of any other good examples of the white lies that we parents tend to use on a daily basis, but you get the idea. I try to eliminate them. I want my child to have a commitment to the truth so that I can trust her when I ask her a question. I tell her the Upshaws are truth-tellers so that she can have a family identity that includes integrity.

Ok, this is getting long. I knew it would. I'm pretty sure you can extrapolate from here how we treat Santa. We've come to a happy medium between my upbringing and my husband's (a more typical, Santa inclusive one). I don't treat Santa like the plague, but I try to make sure he is not the reason for the season or even the slightest majority of its focus and, as you've guessed, I will never tell my children he is real or brings us presents or is omniscient and knows what every child is doing all the time.

Ok, bunny trail... can I just rant for a moment about how Santa is very God-like. He is loving, he knows what you're doing all the time, he can be everywhere at once (pretty much, since there's no scientific way to deliver toys to every kid in the world in one night), children essentially pray to him about bringing them what they want and I'm sure there's more. That all bugs me.

Back to our family...

We do have a picture of the kids on Santa's lap from this year, but we didn't wait in a long line or pay for it. I'm not going to dedicate to much effort to that. And there will not be a page in the album (wait, what album?) every year dedicated to that picture.

We have been watching Wonder Pets save the Baby Reindeer every day by request and we have been reading a book called "I'm Not Santa!" (in which the "real" Santa shows up at the end) every night by request, but yesterday, I did start to see the need for some major balancing with some baby Jesus stories. Especially after Eden said "Santa loves me. He wants to come into my heart!" Woops.

Alright, we need to go to the grocery store. My friend Misty was brave enough to state her views on her blog without apology, so I got the courage to do the same. Love me or hate me for it, that's where I stand.

Don't hate me though, because Santa will know and you will get coal in your stocking. :D

I know it's backwards. I know I'm lame for taking a picture with my computer because I didn't want to upload a picture from a real camera. But there he is, the same figurine my parents had, now displayed in our home.

And, of course, Eden just saw it and said, "Is it Santa Claus?" Don't ask about baby Jesus, nooooo. That seals the deal. More Jesus needed in this house.

Ok, really leaving now...

Wassail

2010-12-01T14:21:00.000-06:00

At Fat Free Vegan's blog there is a yummy sounding wassail recipe that I thought I'd share with all of you. I have not tried it, but all the ingredients leave me with no doubt that it would be the perfect toungue-pleasing, inside-warming drink for the cold days ahead.
I copied from there and pasted here just to make it that much easier for you. :)

New World Wassail

1.5 quarts apple cider or apple juice
1 quart natural cranberry blend drink (no sugar added)
4 sticks cinnamon stick
8 cloves
10 allspice berries
1 quarter-sized slice ginger
1 orange, sliced
1/4 cup cranberries (optional)
1/2 – 1 cup brandy (optional)

Place all ingredients except the brandy in a large, non-reactive pot or crockpot and bring to a low boil. Reduce the heat to the lowest setting and cover. Simmer for at least 2 hours (may be kept in a crock pot for 4 hours). About 15 minutes before serving, add the brandy and continue to simmer on low.

Strain out the spices and fruit and serve with cinnamon sticks and fresh slices of orange.

Servings: 10
Yield: 2.5 quarts

Lit. Revisited

2010-08-13T11:53:00.001-05:00

I've been going through a box of memories and pulling out some things that make me smile. One piece of paper I just read, I decided to share.

This is from Literature class where I was learning different poetry forms by writing. I was 15.

A Question of Speed

Everyone marvels at a snail's sluggish pace.
It's quite easy to see why this is the case.
But really, the reason is not hard to trace.
Why run fast when you're not in a race?

:)

Hydrangeas

2010-08-02T20:39:00.001-05:00

I don't even really like their name... hydrangeas. It's so complex and scientific sounding to me. It doesn't sound like a flower. It sounds like a disease. You drink too much water and become over-hydrated and develop welts all over your body. They're called hydrangeas.
This is not a post about hating hydrangeas, because, well, I'm actually starting to like them for the first time. I never saw what all the hubbub was about. The bushes are big awkward things with poufy clusters of tiny flowers that, on their own would be nothing to speak of. I was recommended hydrangeas by the florist who did my wedding bouquet and I was horrified by the idea. I'm still glad I didn't take her advice, but I AM warming up to this southern favorite.
I came across a lovely blog and particularly this lovely post and beauty like this is just begging to be shared. I won't spoil it by trying to describe it, but let's just say that my warming up to the hydrangea may have just bloomed into love.

Tale of a Tailor

2010-08-01T21:20:00.000-05:00

You know those jeans I had tailored? Well, here's how it went.
I put them on and stood on the little pedestal while the Asian woman pinched and pinned until I was satisfied with the fit in the rear and waist.
She said they'd be ready in a week and cost $25.
They were and they did.
And they are a PERFECT fit!!! These jeans fit the best of any pair I've ever owned and the little yellow stitches all look exactly the same as if they had never been ripped out and redone. She even put the tag back in as if it had never been touched. The only evidence of her work is a seam line on the waistband in the back, but it's barely noticeable. I'd say a custom-fit pair of jeans for $30 ain't half bad. Totally worth shopping for more consignment gems.

Real Simple

2010-07-21T14:50:00.002-05:00

This mag is one of my all time faves and I simply cannot get enough of their "New Uses for Old Things" lists. I really wish I could remember all the clever ideas I've read here over the years.
They've done is again with this post on their web site.

A First

2010-07-20T14:31:00.000-05:00

I'm going with Chuck to the tailor later this afternoon. He's getting some suit pants hemmed for his high school reunion and I'm getting some jeans tailored. I'm hoping to anyway. I've heard Stacy and Clinton (from the TLC show What Not To Wear) say over and over again, "Get pants that fit your hips and then get them tailored to fit your waist."
I get so frustrated with the lack of "curvy" options out there for women whose waists are smaller than their hips. You'd think that was every woman, but apparently not. The majority of pants I try on, especially if they have no stretch to them, gap in the back at the waist. I suppose these pants must fit somebody, but not my body. I happen to know a few other girls with this same issue and then there's all the African American women out there who must also have this problem. They must! I see them with their belts on, walking around the mall, and in the back, I can see that there's a pucker in the waistband under the belt. All that to say that I am not the only one with this problem.
Even Gap's Curvy fit doesn't really work for me. Old Navy's Sweetheart fit is the best I've found, but I don't want to be confined to shopping for pants at Old Navy the rest of my life!
So, last week, I bought a pair of Ann Taylor jeans at a consignment shop for $5. They are too big in the waist and I thought it was the perfect opportunity to see if Stacy and Clinton are right. I'll let you know in about a week.

Cute or Corrupt?

2010-07-19T15:18:00.001-05:00

All too often, I run across things targeted for kids that make me do a double take. Are adults really going to continue to complain that abstinence doesn't work and that kids and teens are too out of control to be trained if they think things like this are ok!!?
It's REDICULOUS to assume that things like this are innocent, buy it for your child (who will see it, memorize it, be wrapped up in it every night) and then have any credibility whatsoever when attempting to train your kid not to be promiscuous!!!
Grrrrr. It makes me so angry.
Look to the right hand column for similar items they recommend.... DORA FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! Linens 'N Things would like me to consider Dora bedding right along with this bedding. You know who likes Dora? My two-year old! I can see it now. "Hey Eden, tell Mommy what comforter you want for your big girl bed. Do you want Dora or Sex?"
Did I say it was rediculous? Well, I wish I could think of a stronger word. It's downright dangerous to let that kind of thinking invade your home while your child is still, well, a child. Equally dangerous to allow a teenager to think this was just cute and nothing else.
I'm so steamed. Satan is so crafty.

Job Hunt - The Memories

2010-07-16T09:16:00.001-05:00

Browsing the Anthropologie website this morning got me thinking about my days of job applications, interviews and employment. I don't know if I'll ever revisit those days again, but I was wondering, if I ever did have the option, where I would put in applications.

I remember being so desperate for ANY sort of job... well, not desperate enough to not be somewhat discriminatory about the applications I filled out. I remember walking the mall and bringing home 25 pieces of paper to fill out and planning to fill out 5 or 6 more online as well.

I remember taking them all back and being frustrated by not being able to see a manager and no way to find out if the store was even hiring at that time. Everyone was so vague. And, of course, the current employees had no interest in truly helping me.

I remember thinking an interview went well and never getting a call.

I remember being offered the position of manager, but then being told that the pay was only 50 cents more and hour and no holidays off. No thanks.

I remember filling out an online application with all sorts of moral questions about honesty and integrity and thinking that my answers were definitely going to be more than satisfactory. A few days later I was told that my online quetionairre answers were not acceptable and that I could try again in a couple of weeks. I did. I got the same response. What? Why don't they want an employee with high moral standards? Did they think I was lying because no one really could answer like that honestly? I still wonder... and I'm still offended.

I remember working for the Disney Store and what a really, truly fun and positive environment it was. I wanted to keep working there and rise through the ranks to become a manager, but then I went to college. Bummer. :D

I remember, while in college, getting fired from not one but two different jobs. That hurt my heart even though, in both instances, it was a mistake on the part of the manager and not me. The first time, I was fired because I didn't show up when the manager thought I was on the schedule, but I really wasn't. The mistake was recognized and I was offered the job back, but I just couldn't bring myself to work with someone like that.

The second time, I was fired because I showed up ready to work because I couldn't remember if I was working that day and I didn't want to miss a shift if I was supposed to be there. What? Yes, you read that right. The manager saw me there and asked me why I showed up when I wasn't on the schedule. I told her I wasn't sure about my schedule. I just wanted to come check so I didn't accidentally miss a shift. She fired me on the spot.

Ah, the joys of working hourly wage jobs.

So back to my original thought. I was thinking I would like to work at Anthropologie a couple days a week. It's funny, even though I'm 30 now, just the thought of job applications takes me right back to my late teens, early twenties.

I guess I'll keep my current day job for now.

Love

2010-07-11T16:50:00.002-05:00

Wherever this is (I found it here)... I MUST have my picture taken there someday. Or have this piece of art, which looks very much to me like Frank Lloyd Wright, in my home (the quote in the background, not the photos themselves... creepy). One or the other. Or both would be fine.

I went back to the post again and read it instead of just looking at the pictures. Amazing what a wealth of information you can find just by reading. ha. The location is The Cliffs Restaurant in Laguna Beach. Perfect. Our next trip is planned as of now.

I Wish

2010-07-07T13:35:00.003-05:00

The beauty in the words of this belief statement I wish I could say originated with me. My feelings coincide, but the words are not mine. Ann Vonkamp wrote them here and I am only pasting them because their beauty should be shared and used to stir others of like faith. Read on:

I believe in Jehovah God who created the whirling galaxies, the birds soaring in the sky overhead, the endless crashing waves and all that dances within them. I believe in Father of all who knits together life, made in His very own image, in the secret quiet of our beings.

I believe in Jesus Christ, the One with no earthly Father, with the dust of this earth between His toes, and with our names etched onto the palm of His hands, right beneath the nail scars…Who now sits at the Father’s right hand making endless intercession on our behalf. I believe in the stone rolled away, in the Body being raised, in the first fruits of the dead…and us all following soon, very soon.

I believe in the Cross as our only Hope, our only Claim, and our only Foundation. I believe that in the pounding surf of life we have only one thing to cling to: the feet of our Lord, hanging on that tree, His lifeblood flowing down, washing us whiter than snow.

I believe in the Holy Spirit, moving, whispering, indwelling our very skin. I believe in living by the Spirit, walking in the Spirit, and producing fruit in the Spirit…in the Spirit who helps us in our weakness with groanings that can’t be expressed in words.

I believe in the infallibility of the Bible, God’s Word - a sure Word, a pure Word, the only secure Word. I believe the words on those pages are breathed from the very throne room of heaven, are the love letter penned from the heart of the Lover of our souls; a beacon of light for stumbling feet to find sure footing on a dark path.

I believe there is more than believing. There is living what I believe.

I have posted another selection from her very amazing blog over on My Cup Runneth Over.

Quite the Opposite

2010-07-04T17:48:00.000-05:00

We decided to leave that first house and it's owners in the dust. We went back and forth with them, but they were unwilling to budge and we were unwilling to pay more than our realtor told us the house was worth, so we walked. The very day we decided to quit and go back to the drawing board, our realtor went by a house that wasn't even on the market yet that a fellow realtor was getting ready to sell. She told us she had just found our perfect home.
We couldn't resist looking, even though it was out of our original, somewhat arbitrary, price range. Wow. It's a really great house. Chuck fell madly in love. I saw some details that weren't my favorite, but, overall, it had great potential to be our next bid. We had our realtor feel out the owner to try to see if he was interested in a particular price which we thought we could afford even though it was less than he thought he could sell it for on the market. He said he'd certainly look at it, so we made an offer contingent on the sale of our home.
He returned to us with a suggestion and that suggestion ended up being an amended offer that he accepted and we officially have a contract! Now we had someone that really wanted to work with us. His suggestion was that we take ownership of the house in August, but then rent it back to him for two months to give us more time to sell and him a place to live while renovating the condo he's moving to. The rent he will pay us is more than the amount we will owe on the mortgage and will cover not only the months he's there, but a month or two more after he vacates. This arrangement give us until January to sell our current home without feeling any repercussions in our wallet. Even better, if we can get someone to buy our home sooner, but wait to move into ours until he vacates, we'll be able to just pocket the extra rent.
We've taken a big step and the only things left to do are secure our financing and get the inspections out of the way. Oh, and sell our house. We're using this Wednesday as a work day. Chuck's taking a vacation day and we're going to do as much as we possibly can to get our house on the market.
I've already started posting about some of the changes over at The Pretty Pickle.

It's a No Go

2010-06-30T14:31:00.002-05:00

So we offered the homeowners of the house I blogged about $25k below their asking price, because, in this market, you never know. We expected them to counter and hoped to meet somewhere in the middle, no higher than $10k below the asking price.

They don't want to budge. They only went down $5k and when we tried again, they stuck with it. We're not budging on our max, so...

nobody's moving yet.

And we're continuing to look.

Goings On

2010-06-28T21:10:00.004-05:00

I'm 30!

Chuck worked from 7am to 7pm, so I celebrated with a birthday donut with my daughter. It was her suggestion, and a great one at that. Who knew Krispy Kreme could be such a fun afternoon outing? We got to watch the donuts roll by on the conveyor belt and get covered with glaze. (I just re-read that and it sounds like we got covered with glaze. That was not the case, although her hands did end up covered in glaze.) She tried counting them, but got stuck at 8 or 9, just like usual and then would start back at 3. hehe

I met with a landscaper this afternoon who wants 3-4k just to spruce up our yard. Um, no. Next, please.

I made an appointment with a painting company to come give us an estimate on touching up the exterior and should be seeing a guy about our interior repainting tomorrow or the next day as well.

Chuck stained and sealed the deck yesterday.

See a pattern here?

Yep, we're gettin' our butts in gear and preparing to put our house on the market.

We drew up an offer to buy a different house this evening. Things have moved pretty quickly, but we're excited at what the new house has to offer... IF we can get it for the price we want. Here are a couple of pictures of the interior for you to enjoy.

This is the huge living room and archway into the dining room. I've already begun to "decorate" and have decided that there's enough space in this room for a craft area, which is very exciting.

This is the den with opening into the kitchen and french doors to the screened in patio/sunroom. The layout of this house is actually almost identical to our current home, there are just a few key differences.

Some of the important changes from one house to the other are as follows:

The yard of our current home is expansive. Beautiful, but expansive. We do want a yard some day. We both love a big blanket of green to welcome you to the house, but Chuck simply doesn't have the time to maintain it at this stage of our lives. The yard of the new home is small, but beautifully landscaped so it has lots of character.

The deck and playset in our current backyard were part of what was attractive about this house, but the screened in sunroom (I HATE mosquitoes!!!) and the covered patio (the sun is just scorching in the summer... or else it's raining) and the POOL at the new house are going to be the perfect escapes from the heat for two girls and their mommy.

The carport in our current home was the MINIMUM we would accept for parking options and, unfortunately, we didn't even really have the choice of any other homes in our price range with garages at the time. In fact, many just had a driveway with no cover. The new house has a two car garage. Yipee!

The master bath in our current home is a jack and jill with the girls' bedroom and opens to the hallway as well. It's just annoying and we never even open the pocket door to their room. The new house's master bath does open to the hallway and the master, but not to another bedroom.

Our current home is a 3 bedroom. I have been saying ever since we got pregnant with Arielle that I wasn't sure how the girls sleeping in one room would work. We made the switch this month and it hasn't worked out at all. They both began waking up earlier and earlier and waking each other up as well. As soon as we put Arielle back in the guest room, everyone got to sleep later. Mommy is happiest with more sleep, but we need a dedicated guest room with a king sized bed. (My parents bought it for us because they refuse to stay with us if they have to sleep on anything smaller.)

The new house has 3 bedrooms, one for us and one each for the girls. AND a pool house with it's own full bath. Hellooooo guest cottage. HAha! I'm so stinkin' excited about our guests having their own quarters that I hardly know what to do with myself. It's possibly THE best thing about the house.

The offer expires tomorrow at 5pm.

Fingers crossed.

Not a Kid Anymore

2010-06-27T17:37:00.003-05:00

It is the day before my 30th birthday.
I am having cheese puffs and wine for my afternoon snack.

There is no party tomorrow.
But we might be putting an offer on a house.
I am not depressed, but I am... feeling... different.

My mother was 30 and just about to have her first and only child, me, this time 30 years ago.
What a huge change for her, and she was already 30 when I happened.
I have two girls, am about to (possibly) own my second house, am married to a doctor, have succumbed to the mini-van mom monster (but I refuse to ever don "mom jeans") and am still coloring my hair red, which I began doing freshman year in college.
Did I mention I turn 30 tomorrow and I'm kind-of conflicted about it?

I might learn to embrace it by the time I turn 31.
I'll let you know.

Homo H8?

2010-06-18T08:43:00.004-05:00

I'm about to open a can of worms. But it's my blog, so if I want worms all over it, that's my prerogative.

I believe homosexuality is sin. I believe it is wrong. I do not want gay marriage to be widely legalized. There. Now that that's out of the way, this post isn't really about my beliefs on that subject, but I wanted to just go ahead and put them out there, because I don't want to dance around that question the whole post. Onward with what I really wanted to post...

I go to E! Online and get my celebrity fix every other day or so. Today, I came across this article about the NO H8 campaign. It was the first I'd heard of it and was curious. I Googled it and read a little bit and saw some more of the photos. I was starting to get perturbed, but decided I needed to learn more before I jumped to conclusions about what the duct tape across the mouth meant. As I continued to research, my first gut reaction was confirmed and I had to do a quick post.

I believe the photo below is the photographer himself, Adam Bouska, if I'm not mistaken.

There are different interpretations of what the duct tape means, but before I even address that. I think the 8 in the NO H8 slogan is very clever way to reference to Proposition 8 (The California Marriage Protection Act), but I don't think the creator is being fair by using the word "hate" to describe the result of a fair vote that didn't go the way a group of people wanted it to. There are always majorities and minorities in votes. The minority doesn't win. So that means the majority HATES the minority? No. It just means the minority doesn't have enough voices yet.

Speaking of voices, now to address the duct tape. It can be interpreted a couple of ways. I read that some people think it means that this is a silent protest of the "hating" that's going on toward gays. Wouldn't that be kind-of redundant though, since a photograph is inherently silent? Still others (and this was my gut reaction) feel that it means that the people "hating" need to be silenced. Once again, I don't feel like this was really well thought through. I'm going to give the creator the benefit of the doubt and assume that he didn't mean for me to read into this all that I did.

But what comes to your mind when you think about a person's mouth being duct taped? Just play the game with me. First thing that comes to your mind... Kidnapping? torture? ... these are extreme, but I'm just saying. When else is duct tape used over the mouth? I didn't vote obviously, but if I had, I would have been on the side voting against gay marriage.

I do not hate gay people, but I am labeled as such and (silently) requested to put duct tape over my own mouth (or maybe they wish to put it there for me?) and support something I don't believe in just to prove I don't hate gay people. Since when is voting on one side of an issue hating the people that vote on the other side of it? Since when is voting not a fair way to determine the laws in our country? Since when is it acceptable by a wide range of people, including Cindy McCain (surprising to me) to want one side of an issue to have no voice?

Isn't the problem that gays feel they don't have a voice? that they don't have a fair say? The solution is not to wish a different group the same unfairness they imagine to have.

And here's another article that takes a completely different, possibly less controversial, twist on how the whole campaign just seems to be self promotion of beautiful people under the guise of a "good cause." Really, their cause is getting less attention or effective action since the voters are who they really would need to get ahold of and the voters who voted against gay marriage probably wouldn't be influenced by hundreds of unoriginal photos. Just sayin'.

Losing It : The Trend Continues

2010-06-17T15:26:00.000-05:00

For the latest update on my bravery and determination, go to Two In My Cup and see the stats.

Vacation Anyone?

2010-06-15T12:34:00.001-05:00

Vacations don't really seem like vacations with two little ones, do they? I know you could have told me that, but apparently I had to experience it myself to know.
Vacations are just your everyday routine in a different location... without all the comforts and familiarity of home... with family that want to spoil your child as much as possible every single day.... and with a spouse, suddenly around 24/7, that you are somehow supposed to be able to effectively communicate and plan with even though you usually only get the chance to practice those skills but for a few hours at the end of the day (if that). Slightly challenging, to say the least.
I don't have the time or the willpower to make a long post about this, even though there's plenty to post.
Suffice it to say, we didn't really adjust to the challenges until MAYBE the last two days of our two week vacation. I would say that we'll be better prepared next time...
In some aspects, I think we will, but we will never be taking a 6 month old and a 2 year old on vacation again. Next time it will be a one year old and an almost three year old, which may be a totally different ball game for all I know.
It was definitely a milestone for me and more of an education than a vacation.

Here are a few enjoyable moments from our education. :)

More of Me

2010-05-16T08:46:00.001-05:00

This blog was intended to give me an outlet, to allow me to practice some creative writing and to help me get to know me by sharing myself with the world... well, with you anyway.
I've been inspired by my beautiful and creative cousin (by marriage), Adair, to re-embrace my literary side. I feel like I've been enriched every time I read her blog, Pen and Ink. Maybe it's just because I haven't really ever gotten the chance to get to know her because we've never lived close to Chuck's family since we married. I am so impressed by her maturity (greater than mine at her age, I think), her love for her family (something I want for my girls), her literary knowledge (more than mine now), her ability to appreciate the details (she photographs them so her readers can appreciate them too) and her turns of phrase (which make everything sound like a Jane Austen novel).
All that was an introduction to my first Poetry Corner post. I'll be sharing some of my own poetry as well as poems I like or have been a part of my life.
I'll share one of my own to start it off. I have a whole journal filled with various writings starting in 1993. I'm not claiming any of them are good. In fact, I know for a fact several are bad, but I'm sharing anyway. (Maybe some of the ones I think are decent first...)

Trees

Trees

Stark figures in the night

Leafy silhouettes in the light

Trees

Complexity concealed

God's handiwork revealed

Another One?!

2010-05-15T16:38:00.000-05:00

I'm starting another blog. Yes, another one. I felt I needed a place dedicated to crafty things. So if you want chatter and random thoughts, come here. If you want crafts and such, go there. See, isn't that much more organized?

The Pretty Pickle is up and running!

On a Lighter Note

2010-05-15T14:01:00.003-05:00

My Much-ness

2010-05-13T15:11:00.012-05:00

Just finished reading this post over at Jen and the Giant Peach. This beautiful girl... woman... lady... (oh my goodness, what are almost-30-year-olds suposed to call one another?!) anyway, she was a dear friend in college and is still very dear to me even though we are far apart in location and in the paths life has taken. I've been waiting with baited breath for a while for her to start blogging and she has finally started her adventure in the blogosphere. She's mostly focused on her upcoming wedding (who wouldn't be?) but she recently did a more personal post. Go read and return.
Any of y'all relate? I have also felt this way recently, as you may know. I was fine for the first two years of marriage. Still in the blissful land of getting a kick out of calling one another husband and wife, my identity hadn't really changed all that much. Being girlfriend and being wife were sort-of similar. Wife was a much more intense version, but there were some perks too. I didn't feel like my entire identity was called into question... until... I had Eden.

Mommyhood is exactly what I wanted and a title I intended to don and relish all along, but somehow, now that I've arrived, this place is monotonous and often too tedious to be enjoyable. While trying to decide whether or not we should upgrade to a van or a larger SUV, I was again slapped in the face with the struggle I involve myself in everyday to be the hip mom, the mom that other people are surprised is a mom, the mom that thwarts the attempts of "the dowdy monster" and stays (or becomes, in my case) stylish and fit. Jennifer's post made me think of Matthew 16:25. Here it is in the Amplified.

"For whoever is bent on saving his [temporal] life [his comfort and security here] shall lose it [eternal life]; and whoever loses his life [his comfort and security here] for My sake shall find it [life everlasting]."

The Sara interpretation: Every time I get caught up in trying to make my life what I think it ought to be, I leave behind what is truly important. If I could just learn to focus on the eternal, I would feel totally fulfilled and satisfied in this life.
My desire to pursue the thing I think God placed in my heart (dance, the use of dance for worship and the ability to teach and choreograph) is frustrated by my inability to do anything related to it at the moment. My children leave me with little energy, little time to myself and no opportunity to take or teach a class. I've often shed tears over the intense desires I still have to be involved in dance. My body is completely unable to do most of what it could in college and my mental knowledge of technique, history and terminology has eroded away.
I've asked God why He tortures me with the desires to choreograph peices with movements I can't even do and with groups I don't have access too. Why am I so exhilerated by teaching and have no students? If I had no children, I could possibly be fulfilling myself in all these areas.
Argh! The rest of my original post was lost because I was trying to do something fancy.... It just basically said that maybe all of the above was good because it might cause me to run harder after God instead of the things that I think I want to do or the things that I want to define me.
blech! I said it better the first time.

3 Dollar Fancies

2010-05-12T14:57:00.014-05:00

I love words. I love poems. I love to write. That's one reason I blog. I don't really exercise my writing skills here as much as I would like, but my brain is more used up than it used to be and poetry and other creative writing ventures don't come as easily as they used to. That's beside the point though.

I went to the Dollar Tree and I bought three sheets of wall stickers. Just the alphabet in sticker form. I've been debating ever since we bought this home about what vinyl wall art I might want to buy, but I can't decide what scripture or saying I want and plus, they're just so darned expensive and I won't be able to take them with me when we leave. For the moment, $3 worth of letters has satisfied me. Wanna see what I did with them?

dance {trust}

I decided to use them on a glass frame too... our very first professional picture as a couple. :)

let love be our accompaniment

Hippie Bow-chic

2010-05-11T09:48:00.005-05:00

I hesitate to post this because I did not do a tutorial and I have not finished the one I started for you. The fact is, I usually don't take pictures along the way when I'm making something with no pattern and have no idea whether or not it will even turn out. This was the case here. I just got a vision in my head, had an hour and some fabric that I wouldn't be too, too sad if I ruined and went at it. Have I spent too much time looking at boutique patterns for toddlers? or can grown-ups wear bows too?

SWAGGER WAGON

2010-05-10T13:55:00.000-05:00

In honor of the addition of an Odyssey to our family... it's not a Sienna, but we'll try our best to have the same amount of swagger.

The Final Countdown, pt. 2

2010-05-05T20:53:00.002-05:00

See. I told you that really wouldn't be the final one. Well, as I was saying...Sort-of along those same lines... I've become aware lately of the possibility that we Christians are too nice, too sweet, too easily molded into something attractive to the world. A friend sent me a YouTube video of a pastor that really stirred me. You can watch the clips here if you like. Don't worry, It's not a whole sermon or anything, just bits.

Then, a couple days ago, I heard this song on the radio and what I heard was completely different than what I would have heard before I watched that video. Here are the lyrics:

Give me rules, I will break them.
Show me lines, I will cross them.
I need more than a truth to believe
I need a truth that lives, moves and breathe
To sweep me off my feet, it's gotta be

More like falling in love than something to believe in
More like losing my heart than giving my allegiance
Caught up, called out, come take a look at me now
It's like I'm falling, oh
It's like I'm falling in love.

Give me words, I'll misuse them
Obligations, I'll misplace them
'Cause all religion ever made of me
Was just a sinner with a stone tied to my feet
It never set me free, it's gotta be

Deeper and deeper
It was love that made me a believer
In more than a name, a faith, a creed
Falling in love with Jesus brought the change in me, it's gotta be...

Chorus

A lot of that is true and sweet, but...
but....
Is God's calling without lines and limits? Is being His child void of rules? Is it just like falling in love and being on a "honeymoon high" with our God? Sometimes. If we depend on that emotion, we won't stick with Christianity for long.
There are too many questions that will demand answers or will at least demand that we look at them square in the eyes and say that we don't know the answers but will still choose to serve our God. There are too many situations where we will be uncomfortable and even derided for the sake of our God. (persecution, hello!) There is too much at stake to hang it on something that's "like being in love."
I was almost embarrassed for the writer of this song telling God "It's gotta be" this way or else I'm not going to be able to follow through with it. Yes, there is grace for our unwilling, dis-abled human hearts. Yes, our Lord woos us as a lover and wants us for His bride. But, just as in a marriage, it takes the fortitude of commitment to grow the relationship. It takes a commitment to honoring the rules, the lines and the obligations. The things is, the more you grow together, the sweeter the obligations become and the farther from the lines you stay.

The Final Countdown

2010-05-05T13:57:00.004-05:00

Not really... I'm sure there will be another countdown. When I'm a couple months away from 40. But right now, it's the countdown to 30. The big three zero. That's right. I know, I know. You can't believe it. I look like I'm going to turn 21, not 30. Well, believe it. And even though I've lived almost 30 years on this earth, I feel like I've only just begun to know myself, to be somewhat ok with myself and to dip my toes into the concept that what others think or project on me ultimately doesn't matter.
Can you imagine how we would feel and act if we could fully grasp representing Christ and His calling for us, His grace and graciousness (meaning that He wouldn't just run pell mell over people because He didn't care what they thought) AND were also able to fully grasp the non-importance of our measly concerns compared with eternity (meaning that we wouldn't stop to bother with the petty concerns of others or ourselves if they distracted us from the ultimate goal)? I can kind-of imagine it. The fact that I can't even fully imagine it just shows how utterly far I am from attaining it.
I am now going to write the rest of what is on my mind and heart in a second post. Wasn't I nice to you? Now you don't have to feel guilty for stopping mid-post because it's so dang long and you really weren't expecting to devote this much time to my blog at the moment. Or you can choose to read the next post. :)
I'll be 30 June 28, by the way.

In Honor of Mother's Day

2010-05-01T08:10:00.002-05:00

...and all of us struggling through the young marrieds with kids stage. My friend Melissa suggested another video by the same woman who did "Wrinkled Ladies," Anita Renfroe. I laughed and laughed at "Wrinkled Ladies" and was totally ready for more.

Go watch this and then come back here to read my thoughts.

What I wasn't ready for was the tears that came because this one hit a bit too close to home.

On the other hand, it brought up again something that's really been weighing heavily on my mind lately. I don't want to have a pity party, (here comes the "but")

but it's just been pretty dang hard to do this kid-raising thing with a husband who often works long hours, must sometimes work nights, often must take his free time and leave home again to study or work on a presentation etc. and no relatives to take the kids for just an hour even. I know I am not the only one who feels this way. In fact, most of the people I currently keep the company of are in the exact same situation and often have less husband time than I do. I was just talking with one of my friends yesterday about the fact that we might have felt totally different about the number of kids we choose to have or the amount of enjoyment we would or would not feel about raising them in different circumstances. I can't even imagine what my stress level would be like if Chuck got home at 4 every day, had no work to do outside of work and if we both got to sleep though the night and if the mom or mother-in-law could take the kids (or even one of the kids) for just an hour or two every now and then. Every one has trade offs, I know. I also know that there are moms in much worse situations than I. I know some women don't even have a husband. I know some people's kids are sick or worse behaved or, or, or... I also know that this sacrifice now is to have a pretty sweet situation in just a few years.

I KNOW. I'm just letting it out, ok? This is the real me. I'm not going to pretend that I don't ever get into a funk about this stuff. I'll get it all back in perspective in a couple hours and buck up and get back to what really matters. Don't worry.

Quick Note on Tutorials

2010-04-30T13:36:00.003-05:00

I am delaying my meeting with Jillian Michaels. I know there will be pain involved.

I wanted to write a quick note before I forget regarding tutorials. I want to start posting some. The reason I never have is because I've never thought what I have made was at ALL interesting enough, different enough, or just plain quality enough for anyone else to want to try. I wouldn't mind just sharing with a girlfriend how I did something, but to put it out here on the web feels like I'm claiming to be good at this or know the right way to do it.

I am making neither of those claims, but I've decided to just not care if anyone thinks I am. Or maybe I could make a disclaimer to put at the top of every tutorial.

I will try to do the pillowcase blouse tutorial soon, but there may be a couple of less time-consuming ones coming your way before that. Maybe a hair clip and a way to spruce up a shirt using a zipper... fingers crossed that I get some time to do them!

Ok, ok Jillian, I hear you calling my name. As soon as I'm sure the babies are going to sleep, I'll join you in the living room for some more shredding.

All Types of Ladies

2010-04-29T07:27:00.004-05:00

Beyonce isn't my favorite singer or anything, but there's something about her Single Ladies song and video that I really enjoy. I'm amused, impressed, drawn in. If you haven't seen it, you can watch it by clicking here. (There may or may not be an ad before the video.) Her dancing is phenomenal. I don't know if it can be fully appreciated how difficult the choreography is unless you try it yourself. I can say that because I'm trying to learn it. Yes, I've spilled the beans. I'm learning the choreography to Single Ladies to challenge myself... and just for fun. But that's not what this post is about.

Just today, a friend on FB posted a video that amused and impressed me even more.

Check it out here. But don't watch it unless you've already seen the original. Trust me.

The Matrix of the Heart

2010-04-28T14:24:00.003-05:00

I was thinking today (not an unusual pastime for me) that there are so many songs out there that talk about putting up walls around our hearts and protecting ourselves from more heartache that, oftentimes, that becomes part of our way of thinking even as Christians. Don't let yourself get walked on or hurt again. Be strong and smart, etc.

It struck me (and by that I mean, the Holy Spirit taught me something) that God, who is hurt and slandered and betrayed and scorned constantly by the ones He loves the most, continues to reach out, give of Himself and offer His affections in the very same manner. Now, that's not so impressive, I guess. He's God, right? We're just humans.

Well, I think He can do that because He doesn't depend on anyone else for His image, His confidence, His security. He knows exactly Who He is and He's not concerned that what someone thinks or says about Him will change that. Now, we know from His Word that He can be grieved and saddened, but that doesn't stop Him from giving to us.

Yes, we are "just" human, but that's why Christ died for us... to give us abilities that we can't expect to have by depending just on our human condition and sinful nature. Guess what? If we know who we are in Christ, we have the fortitude (and the calling, by the way) to keep loving and reaching out to people that have hurt us. We can have the ultimate confidence in Whose we are and Who holds our hearts in His safekeeping. Why should we worry about or image, our pride, our soulish selves?

I'm not trying to sound insensitive. I'm not saying I can actually accomplish this. I just caught a glimpse of what might be possible if we were to fully embrace Christ's gift and purpose for us. I'm not saying to be unwise. Don't get physically hurt. Don't put your life at risk.. unless the Holy Spirit leads you to. Oh, to be so close to the Spirit that we knew HIS wisdom instead of depending only on common sense and worldly advice. What makes sense to the world doesn't cut it in God's Kingdom and those who follow Him should look like fools to the world.

It's like the Matrix out there. Everyone in the Matrix follows the rules of their computer coded world. Laws of gravity, time etc. But those "delivered" from the Matrix and with knowledge of the deception do not abide by those rules and even make decisions that look unwise to those still inside and unaware.

Let's get risky with our hearts. Because really, there's no risk at all if they already belong to the One Who made them.

Favorite Friday

2010-04-23T16:35:00.007-05:00

Favorite hobby besides dancing: photography!

I would LOVE to be paid to do this, but I don't know enough to be confident enough to ask for anyone's money, besides, as soon as you get paid for something, stress is introduced into your hobby and I want to just be free to enjoy it.

So maybe I wouldn't love to be paid to do this. But I guess I kind of am anyway.

Paid in the currency of smiles and cherished memories, ohhs, ahhs and wows.

A Hostess at Heart...

2010-04-23T09:07:00.002-05:00

...I am not. But I do wish, one day, to acquire the skills and the accessories to be a marvelous hostess.

Here is one tutorial I could SO do in the meantime. Please go and check out this awesome DIY if you have ever served cupcakes or other dainty sweets and wished for a beautiful or unique tiered cake stand to present them on.

I am SO doing this!!

Wishful Wednesday

2010-04-21T13:23:00.004-05:00

I always thought cleaning ladies were for people with money and big houses. My perception may be changing. A friend of mine had a lady come to do spring cleaning for her because she is having a baby in June and wanted the house extra clean. That started me thinking that maybe I should do that once every three or four months. Then, when I was talking to someone else about it, she said that her friend HAD to make room for it in the budget on a regular basis and now her marriage is a lot happier. That's the one thing she just really disliked doing and her husband really liked being done, so now they're both happy.

And just today, at breakfast with a lovely group of ladies, one of them mentioned that she has someone come regularly and that it really lets her focus on other things (aka. the kids) and makes her husband happy as well. She said it's the best money she spends in her month and hasn't bought clothes in a while just so she can keep the cleaning lady coming back.

Wow!

It's true, though, that just to keep the house picked up and tidy, not CLEAN is a daunting task and one I rarely accomplish. It seems I'm always juggling schedules. One is up. The other is sleeping. They're both sleeping and I don't want to wake them by doing loud things like putting away dishes or vacuuming. The one that just woke up wants a snack and then wants to play outside. It gets too crazy to stay in the house a second longer, so we go out. It never ends. I also feel like, even though I do play with them and feed them and hold them and bounce them etc. that I never quite give myself to it completely. It's not that I'm consciously thinking about the fact that there are other things to do, but I do think I could enjoy them more if I knew the floors, windows, tubs, toilets and sinks were clean and all I had to do was laundry and picking up after myself and them.

So now I'm seriously wishing for, seriously considering the possibility of... "the cleaning lady," whoever she may be, paying us a visit. Maybe even on a regular basis. It's been a rough month or two with the budget and we're considering buying a bigger car for me to cart the girls around in, so this may continue to be on the back burner and stay a wish for a while.

Any thoughts? do you have a cleaning lady? and if not, how do you make the cleaning happen with small kids?

New Clothes!

2010-04-20T10:47:00.004-05:00

I FINALLY got a chance to sew something else! I've had piles and piles of fabric on the guest room bed calling me and then it all got put away at Easter because my parents came to see us. I got it out again a couple of days ago while looking for my craft box with all my bow making supplies in it. I failed to find the box, but the fabric started calling me again.

I decided to make something for myself this time. Since, for the most part, all I have to wear these days are clingy t-shirts of various colors and designs, I've been wishing for something a bit stiffer to hide my left-over baby belly. I can't seem to find anything in stores I like that I'm also willing to pay the $$$ for. I have been wanting to try a pillowcase top or dress for a while and decided to take the hour that was handed to me by a miraculously coordinating schedule and go for it. Here's what I came up with! I think it looks better with a belt, but not this belt. I need to get a natural fiber belt, something similar to the hat...

Favorite Friday

2010-04-16T12:25:00.003-05:00

This whole Favorite Friday thing is actually kinda weird for me because I usually don't like the question: "What's your favorite _________?"

I certainly never thought I would have a favorite nail polish. My favorite color has been purple for as long as I can remember, but I've never cared for lavender really. And I definitely never considered it for a nail polish color.

For some strange reason, as of the past couple of months, I just feel so pretty with this particular nail polish color on my fingernails. It's called "Done Out In Deco" by OPI and I can't explain my attraction to it.... but I love it!

I have painted my nails with it no less than three times in the last few weeks, and with about 15 nail polish colors that I like to cycle through, that's saying a lot. Painting my nails has become a new way for me to express myself, feel pretty and relax after the kids have gone to bed. It's somewhat therapeutic. I find that, lately, I'm holding on to anything that I feel makes me an individual... separate from just being "Mommy." It's not that I don't want to be "Mommy," but I am still struggling to find myself within that relatively new label.

Wow, this post turned out to be deeper than I intended. Maybe I need a shrink. Or maybe I should just repaint my nails.

Wishful Wednesday

2010-04-14T13:23:00.004-05:00

My wish, as of late, has been for some great family photos. My parents came in town for Easter and my Mom took this gem...

but I wanted more. I have been wanting some photos of us in the downtown area for some time and then a friend of mine who is a photographer posted on Facebook that she would be doing some mini-sessions in the downtown area. The price was reasonable, the date was available for us and I couldn't pass up the opportunity to capture our family as it is now, in the city where we are building it.

Didn't Misty Slay of Fresh Fotography do a marvelous job?! I'll show you more when we get more pics to show. She just gave us a sneek peek while we wait for the files on CD. I am so, so happy I got my wish.

It's About Faith

2010-04-07T13:57:00.005-05:00

We watched Ben Stein's "Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed" last night. We have a subscription to Netflix now and it's allowing us to get films that we otherwise might not bother to see because we're not having to pay 4 or 5 dollars a piece to see them.

If you haven't seen this film. I highly, highly recommend it. I know I'm coming from a belief system that probably allowed me to easily receive what the film was saying, but I was really impressed with Ben Stein's methods and questions. He did not seem biased or close-minded to me and often tried to assume the point of view of the majority, only to find a different truth.

I must say that the opening sequence with footage of the Berlin wall and other interspersed footage throughout of clips ranging from a bully sitting on a young boy, to men slapping one another, to Nazi Germany were a bit overkill if the makers of the film were hoping that those not already persuaded that Intelligent Design is a valid theory would watch and not be offended. In other words, I think that those not in his camp, Ben Stein immediately offended by his satire and metaphors instead of gently bringing everyone together on a journey of discovery.

Some random things that struck me:

There is a point in the film toward the end where a certain evolutionary biologist, Richard Dawkins, reads a section from his book "The God Delusion" describing the Judeo-Christian God as all sorts of awful things like homophobic, murderous and other evil adjectives. He also assures Ben Stein that he believes in no gods whatsoever. If taken to it's end, this belief means that life is merely happenstance and a series of accidents, there is nothing beyond it to live for and therefore, no reason to behave a certain way, deny ourselves whatever we want, or have any regard for any other of the meaningless human lives around us. The conclusion that I reach from this is that there is no point in criticizing the God you do not believe in by calling Him evil. If there is no God, there is no good and there is no evil and no moral standard. So the God you do not believe in can not be evil. Do you see what I see? The belief that there is no God almost implodes upon itself. If you want to believe there is no God for other reasons, then fine, but don't call His character into question. You have nothing by which to judge it if He does not exist.

There was also a fabulous section of the film where they show animations of a typical cell's inner workings. It was like worship just to look at it. Incredible. Phenomenal! Words can't describe the awe which I felt. It's been a long time since I learned about the parts of a cell and it was a good review in why our God is so great. Many scientists have staked their entire belief system on a one in several trillion chance of just the right order of proteins coming together to even make the first one-celled organism. What strong faith they have in their theory!

No one Ben Stein interviewed could tell him empirically the origin of life. (of course) It takes faith to believe what no one was there to see for themselves.

Parents' Beware

2010-04-02T08:41:00.002-05:00

I've been concerned, ever since I got pregnant that there wouldn't be any quality shows on for my little one to watch once she got here. I've been so pleased to find that there are still shows other than ones that include disrespectful sponges. We like to watch Super Why, Sid the Science Kid and Dinosaur Train in the mornings, and, generally, I'm very happy with the messages these shows present.

My ears are always tuned in though, in case there should be an episode that teaches my daughter something I don't want her to learn. I want her to learn truth, not just what the world thinks is good and right, but real TRUTH.

Today, the episode of Super Why we saw confirmed that I do, in fact, need to be vigilant. I'll try to make the description short. I just wanted to share my thoughts about what I saw.

If you're not familiar with Super Why, the show format is that one of the four kids who are the main characters always has some sort of issue in the beginning. They don't know what the right thing is to do and they call together the "Super Readers," which are their alter egos, to fly into a book and find the answer to the problem. The "right" book magically floats down from the shelves of thousands and from the moral of the story and some letters they find along the way, they learn what their appropriate action should be in real life.

Today, the issue was that one of the little girls had a basket full of apples and didn't want to share. They entered a book where a man had a goose that laid many, many golden eggs. The village people wanted some of his eggs and he wanted not only to keep them all for himself, but also for the goose to lay more and more and more.

The first thing I noticed was that the "Super Readers" focused on helping the goose lay more and more eggs, instead of addressing the man and his issues with greed and selfishness. The goose got very tired because she was caused to lay all these eggs (which, the "Super Readers" didn't seem to understand was their fault). The story ended with the heros changing the last line of the story to make sure the goose only laid two more eggs and could take a vacation. That was it! What? Why even introduce the story as a problem with the man sharing his eggs and pushing the poor goose for more if all you're going to do is help the poor goose lay more?

The secret letters that pop up along the way give them the ultimate answer to the issue at hand when they get back to their clubhouse. The letters spelled "share" in this case, which was good.... but then the little girl says "well, I guess I do have a lot of apples."

So what this story taught my child is:

Firstly, that the Bible isn't our source for answers... but I don't really have a beef with that. I didn't expect it to teach that. Just something to be aware of.

Secondly, that greed is ok as long as you share some in the end.

Thirdly, that the concerns of others (aka the goose) shouldn't be considered...only the ultimate goal.

Lastly, that sharing is only for those who have much more than they could ever use themselves, which allows greed to continue to have a place while satisfying your conscience by giving a little of the excess.

Parents! Beware! Be vigilant! Be involved! Don't let "safe," cute shows make you comfortable. Sift through the cuteness to see what your child is learning and make sure they know the real truth from you.

Wishful Wednesday

2010-03-24T11:45:00.004-05:00

motivation

creativity

energy

patience

and this purse...

It's a purse. It's a diaper bag. It's a fashion statement. It's Spring! I love it. It looks like it would just fit so well under my arm. It reminds me of a buttery, yummy crescent roll, but better, because you can enjoy this crescent over and over again. :) I like to carry a purse as a diaper bag every once and a while. It makes me feel a little more fashionable and a little less bound by my "Mommyness." Like the new word I made up?

This bag isn't in my budget right now, but I still like looking at it. So lovely. Want it for yourself? Shop Fuchst Bags on Etsy. (of course it's on Etsy.)

Random. Random

2010-03-24T11:35:00.003-05:00

I never win anything, but I won a contest on YouTube! The contest was to celebrate a girl getting 200 subscribers to her channel. She asked her subscribers to create a makeup look for spring using all drugstore products except one. The prize was a $10 gift card to E.L.F. makeup online. That might not seem like much, but when there are so many options from E.L.F. that are only $1, $10 goes further than you would think. (Darn shipping costs!) I got 11 things for a total of $8 and some change including shipping. It shipped today and I can't wait to try out what I ordered!

Why are all my cool fonts gone from my blog!!!? I hope it's not permanent. I might have to invest in a real blog design if they don't come back soon. I do not at ALL remember how I programmed them to show up in the first place. Whatever I did, I know it was complicated and took several hours. I am NOT doing that again...

I have lost 6 pounds in the month of March! Apparently I had not hit that much of a plateau. I just needed to be more active and cut down the fat intake a bit. We'll see how long I can keep up this pace without having to eat only salads. (Which I could not do.)

N.M.M.

2010-03-22T13:45:00.003-05:00

I did not take off a perfectly good three coats of hot pink nail polish that I was very much enjoying looking at on my nails to put on a khaki/mushroom grayish color that I really don't care for just because I heard that it was a spring trend for nails. I never follow trends over my personal preferences.

I do not need the motivation of mild depression over the inability to shop for what I consider to be cute things in order to keep me going to the gym. I am completely self-motivated.

I am not considering going blonde even though I said I would never do that because of how much it damages your hair. My curiosity over how I would look as a blonde (even though I know it would probably wash me out) would never cause me to actually attempt it.

Flowers In Her Hair

2010-03-15T15:16:00.003-05:00

I used to wear flowers in my hair almost every day while I was in college. Just picking up stems of blooms I liked at Michael's and trimming them down was all it took. No pins, no clips, just a basket full of various sizes and colors of flowers waiting to adorn a french twist, bun or braid. I hated going to dance class with the same ol', same ol' hairstyle day after day, so this was one way for me to be creative. I don't know why I don't wear flowers in my hair much any more, except that I do wear it down a lot more than I did back then (but that's what clips are for, right?). Most moms are the other way around I think. They used to wear their hair down until baby came and pulled it out and then toddler came along and made so much mess that mom needs her hair out of her face to clean it all up... etc.

All that was an intro to a new online shop called Poor Man's Wife that I discovered through Today's Giveaway and I love, love, love their flower hair accessories. They have taken it to the next level by adding the sophistication of fabrics and their products are totally customizable, which is my favorite part of anything I buy these days.

You can buy things straight from Poor Man's Wife through this link and/or you can click here to enter to win a hair pretty from them. Go look and be inspired.

Next Stop on the Makeup and Skin Care Train...

2010-03-15T08:27:00.003-05:00

That title is almost longer than this post, huh?

Here's my latest makeup and skincare update if you're interested. Of course, it's a YouTube video. If you have about 10 minutes and you want to know the latest on Bare Minerals and trying to get clear skin, click here.

A Trio of Twos

2010-03-12T15:51:00.003-06:00

Awwww.... 2 months, 2 weeks and 2 days until our 5th anniversary. Just wanted to note it before it changes.

I guess 5 months, 5 weeks and 5 days until our 5th anniversary would be cooler, but that's kind-of impossible, isn't it?

Favorite Friday

2010-03-12T08:12:00.003-06:00

I had a vision. I had a vision to create something wearable out of a shirt that I loved on the hanger, but just didn't look at all right on me. A few snips, a few stitches and voila! a new life for a neglected shirt.

My very favorite thing this beautiful Friday morning?

An easy-peasy 15 min. refashion with the end result being a dress I LOVE. (possibly more than anything else I've made... except the birthday dress. That one takes the cake. hehe)

I have a pattern for refashioning men's dress shirts three or four different ways into little girl dresses that I can't wait to try, but this is very satisfying for now.

Wishful Wednesday

2010-03-10T08:39:00.003-06:00

My wish for today is to receive a package in the mail. Isn't it always so exciting to get a package? I got a package in the mail last week that had my jacket in it that I had left at my parents', but that doesn't count.

I signed up for several free samples today, so, in a few weeks my wish will come true. I'm getting shampoo from L'Oreal, a coupon for a free sandwich from Corner Bakery, and some Crest White strips. Yea for free samples! About a week and a half ago, I got my free Mario Badescu samples, which I have been faithfully using. Yea for free samples in quantities enough to last more than one use!

N.M.M.

2010-03-08T07:56:00.004-06:00

I am not in pain whenever I do anything today just because I danced in church yesterday... for part of a song. This is certainly not an indication of my fitness level.

I did not actually think that my daughters were collaborating in fussiness day before yesterday. I know there's no way they could do that.

I did not stay up for 2 hours after feeding Arielle because I was upset with my husband for not getting up to feed her as he said he would the night before.... when it turns out, even though I thought I had woken him up, I hadn't. Not me.

I do not throw away at least one thing a week by accident. My brain would not just randomly shut down like that. Not my perfectly functioning tarp as a shack brain.

Bravery + Determination = .... We'll See

2010-03-06T01:25:00.002-06:00

Here it is. My body.

I told myself I wouldn't beat myself up this time about whatever shape my body was in after having Arielle. And I didn't.

But it's been 3 1/2 months and it's time to get my butt in gear and leave some of it behind at the gym.

We have a beach trip scheduled in June and I'd like to get excited about packing my swimsuit. So here goes nothing. I'll show you the after video, whenever I feel like there's an "after" to show.

Favorite Friday

2010-03-05T14:53:00.003-06:00

Mustela products... specifically, the diaper cream. It's called Vitamin Barrier Cream and it has Zinc in it, which I find to be the best ingredient to look for in a diaper cream. This stuff is just a pleasure to use. It smells nice, not fragranced, just nice. It's really creamy, not goopy or sticky or pasty. And, best of all, it protects my girls' bottoms without clogging up my cloth diapers.

I didn't think I would ever find a suitable alternative to Arbonne's diaper cream, which I still love, but this stuff is the answer. It's affordable, it's portable and it has shea butter and vitamins to soften the skin and encourage cell regeneration while the zinc oxide protects.

Another Mustela product I really like, but that isn't so affordable is the wipes. It's the smell again. Mustela products have a signature smell and it's just lovely. So soft. They even make a perfume that I really would love to have... for me AND for my babies. Of course, my girls don't care how they smell, but a fragrance just adds more layers to your memories and experiences and I don't see anything wrong with wanting everyone around me to smell nice.

Ok, it's a little wierd to perfume your baby.

If you haven't been able to try Mustela, you should give them a chance. I think it's worth taking a step up from the drugstore brands to something I really, truly enjoy getting the chance to use.

It'sa me, Mario!

2010-02-18T14:46:00.004-06:00

It's been 15 years. I've had acne for 15 years.

That's about the only thing I can say has been consistent in my life for that long. I mean, my parents have loved me for longer... and, you know, I've been breathing for longer and stuff like that, but I can't say I've been married that long, or been working somewhere that long or anything like that. You know what I mean.

My face is worn out. And, at 29, I think it stinks that I don't get to have a complexion that's clear. Soon the fine lines start right? I didn't get to just enjoy my face before the signs of aging begin. There's been something on my face every day for 15 years. If there was a rare day without a blemish, then there's always the scars, the marks, the blotchyness.

I feel so vain. I'm near being depressed about this as of late. It's just exhausting. Every day, trying to either cover something up, or pretend it's not there and that others don't notice. Somehow, God has blinded my husband to it. Whew! I really never thought I would be comfortable in front of anyone without makeup on, but I can just relax and totally forget with him.

I've been on Accutane twice, all the topical and oral meds that dermatologists perscribe, ProActiv, Arbonne's acne kit, various face washes with salycilic acid or benzoyl peroxide and, most recently, a blemish-clearing routine by Juice Beauty.

nothing has worked

It's the kind of thing you just don't give up on though because you see people every single day talking about how they cleared theirs up. My skin can't be the one in a million that no product will help.

My next experiment is going to be with Mario Badescu. Never heard of him? Me either. Here's the web site. I don't feel like going into great detail about it, but his products contain sulfur instead of salycilic acid or benzoyl peroxide, so they have the potential to give me different results. My free samples are coming in the mail any day now, and I am hanging my hope on them, just like every other thing I've tried.

Here I go again.

Wishful Wednesday

2010-02-17T13:55:00.007-06:00

I am wishing today for a date. A date with my husband without the kids. A date with my husband without the kids where we reminisce about how we met and other memories. A date with my husband without the kids where we reminisce about how we met and other memories while dancing the night away. A date with my husband without the kids where we reminisce about how we met and other memories while dancing the night away after dinner at Dante's Down the Hatch. Oh yes, now THAT's something worth wishing for.

Yum. Fondue at Dante's Down the Hatch in Atlanta. Their website describes the restaurant as:

"...an entertainment complex (built) around the illusion of an 18th century sailing ship tied to the wharf of a mythical Mediterranean village."

"Rising high above the Wharf is the impressive stern of a full-rigged sailing vessel... mast, sails and all... with a moat, complete with live crocodiles surrounding the hull..."

The menu is mostly fondue with a few exceptions...

and jazz music is played live six nights a week from the ship.

One thing I MUST try before I die is their chocolate fondue. You have to order it two days in advance (TWO DAYS) and it is served to you personally by Dante himself. He only serves one a night.

"The fruit is hand-picked at the market and the Swiss honey-base chocolate is hand folded by our chefs and brews for eight hours. "

"Dante suggests you finish your meal 2-3 hours before coming here for the chocolate fondue; then plan on gorging for a minimum of two hours."

wow.

I sense a 30th birthday celebration in the works. I am also sensing that my husband is going to read this post and take it in serious consideration when wondering what in the world to do for me for my birthday.

Vlogger, Blogger... whatever

2010-02-10T15:57:00.002-06:00

I have, without really intending to, made my first vlog and posted it on YouTube. I intended to post it... I just didn't really know it was a vlog when I was filming it. I just felt like talking and getting some things off my mind while I had a few minutes.

The reason I'm letting you know about it is because it also counts as my "I Want That Wednesday" entry. By the way, I think "Wishful Wednesdays" sounds better, don't you? I rechristen Wednesdays "Wishful Wednesdays."

Now that that's done, you can go watch and see what I'm wishing for, if you're interested.

Click here.

It's Amazing...

2010-02-10T12:24:00.006-06:00

what you can accomplish by foregoing a shower. :)

This dress is one of three pieces in an elaborate birthday outfit that I conceived the idea for after receiving my fabric order the first week of January.

I am truly amazed at how in love with my creation I am. As usual, it is far from perfect and I would never think of showing certain details because of my inexperience.

But the model really shows it off well, in my opinion. :)

N.M.M.

2010-02-08T15:33:00.004-06:00

I did not just realize that there has been a fan on stand in my entry for I don't know how long. If you had asked me if there was a 4 foot tall fan standing in my entry, I would, of course have said "Yes, absolutely." I did not discover it because I was vacuuming up very large dust-bunnies and had to detour around the fan's base to get to the corner.

Favorite Friday

2010-02-05T21:04:00.002-06:00

One day, along with many items of clothing from Anthropologie, I will also fill my wardrobe with dresses from Shabby Apple. Sophisticated, modest, attractive and unique, their designs are style-defining and I would love for mine to be defined by them.

The DIY Dish

2010-02-04T14:08:00.003-06:00

Ah, to have a full day, or two or three just to sew and sew. I'm pining after my sewing machine and have so many things in mind (as usual) that I want to try. The fabric that I've bought stares at me from it's disheveled pile on the guest room bed when I change the baby's diaper or put her down for a nap and calls quietly to me throughout the day, "We want to become beautiful little tops, dresses and bags for you and your girls! Come play with us!" Alas, I only continue to find more inspiration and more patterns and less time to complete anything.

On that note...

In order to win a sewing machine or embroidery machine (how incredibly awesome would that be!!!) I'm posting this video here and unselfishly allowing you a chance to win too. Go to www.thediydish.com to enter and get on their newsletter to be updated with free videos that will have tutorials for all sorts of projects that maybe you will have time to do, since I don't.

N.M.M. addendum

2010-01-25T16:49:00.002-06:00

I think it is fittingly hilarious that, even though I thought I had made a breakthrough in the Not Me Monday post below. (Look two posts down.) I, in fact, did not. I wrote the first part on Saturday and wrote the rest today and published it today for my N.M.M. post. So pleased with myself, I was. (channeling Yoda there...)

Then, come to find out, when I posted it, it posted with Saturday's date, the date I first saved data for the post. Lame. I thought if I posted it on Monday, Monday's date would be attached.

Now I know. Live and learn and do better next Monday.

Love equals War

2010-01-24T15:35:00.004-06:00

I heard Jordin Sparks new song "Battlefield" today while out with my girls. One of my favorite things is finding truth (REAL truth) in things that weren't trying to convey it. Here's what I was thinking about as I listened...

One minute it's love
And suddenly it's like a battlefield

A battle isn't what I was thinking about when I married my husband. I was thinking love and bliss and sometimes it will be hard and commitment and all that stuff... but not war.

One word turns into a war
Why is it the smallest things that tear us down?
My world's nothing when you don't
I'm not here without a shield
Can't go back now

That's right, it's for life and we're in a battle against the Prince of Darkeness. He would like nothing better than to turn us against one another and make the war between us instead of between us and him.

Ephesians 6:12

¹²For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Both hands, tied behind my back with nothing
Oh no, these times when we climb so fast to fall again
Why we gotta fall for it now

Everything's going great and then suddenly we're in an argument, right? or someone's feelings get hurt and the night is ruined. We climb so fast to fall again.

I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for

So many interpretations here: I didn't even know I was becoming a soldier when I got married. I enlisted in more than companionship and didn't realize it.

Of course we don't want to hurt our spouse (usually), but we do and they hurt us and we look back on our day or our month or our life and say, "How did we even get here?" Don't even know why we're fighting with each other and we lose sight of what we should be fighting for.

Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield?
Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield?
Why does love always feel like

Can't swallow our pride
Neither of us wanna raise that flag
If we can't surrender then we both gonna lose
What we had, oh no

Compromise... more than compromise, it's surrender. Surrender to God. Surrender to Him and therefore, to each other. Mutual servanthood. Sounds like both become wooses? Nope, without surrender we both gonna lose. Any win by one or the other is a loss for the team.

^{Ephesians 5:21}

²¹Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.

I guess you better go and get your armor
(Get your armor)
Get your armor
I guess you better go and get your armor
(Get your armor)
Get your armor
I guess you better go and get your

I love this part. Of course, she means armor to defend ourselves from each other, but what armor ARE we admonished to put on every day?

Ephesians 6:11

¹¹Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

Truth around our waist, Righteousness protecting our hearts, walking in Peace, deflecting Satan's attacks with Faith and driving him back with the Word. And praying always... it's the hardest to pray together when you're upset isn't it? I have to admit that we've never done that. It's a great idea though, yes? What better way to remind yourselves and Satan that you know what the war is really for, what it's really about. What a great way to purposefully declare that you both know that the things going on in the spirit world are even more real and important than the temporal things of this world.

We could pretend that we are friends tonight
(Oh, oh, oh)
And in the morning we'll wake up and we'll be alright

Woops. God doesn't recommend that...

Ephesians 4:26

²⁶"In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.

Often it is easier to pretend or ignore, but facing our issues in short order will ensure Satan does not get a foothold in our hearts. And, after all, pretending is, in the end, just pretend.

'Cause baby, we don't have to fight
And I don't want this love to feel like

A battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield

I guess you better go and get your armor

I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for
(Fighting, fighting for)

Selah.

N.M.M.

2010-01-23T14:23:00.004-06:00

I did NOT realize about five minutes ago that I don't have to write "Not Me Monday" posts actually on Monday. I did NOT just realize about five minutes ago that I could take the opportunity to write this post in segments throughout the week as things happen that I would like to share. I have always known that I could just write something while I was thinking about it, save it and post it at a later date. So I am, of course, not writing this on Saturday.

I did not use my baby's tummy-time play mat to measure out the fabric pieces for the birthday outfit I'm making Eden. (See the inch marks on the top right of the picture?) I, of course, have a professional measuring mat thingy (you can tell I have one because I know exactly what it's called) on which I measure and cut all my projects. i would never just use things like 8 1/2 by 11 paper and tummy-time mats to measure with.

Forgiveness

2010-01-17T12:10:00.003-06:00

I had a teachable moment last night. It's not often fun to be in the middle of a teachable moment. Those moments are usually uncomfortable or unpleasant. Well, no different here.

I was upset with someone. I felt they had not made the best choices and had, in turn, inconvenienced me. I then stewed.

After a few minutes of stewing, God reminded me I needed to forgive and that I was only hurting myself by continuing to hold on to my disgruntled-ness.

So I set out to convince myself to forgive, regardless of how I felt. "Well," I thought, "he didn't really mean to. He had no ill intentions. In fact, he was probably thinking he was doing me a favor. His heart was probably in the right place." I was becoming pleased with myself. I'm so generous to realize these things and give the benefit of the doubt. This is really helping me work towards forgiveness.

Then God cut into my thoughts. "Wrong. That's not what I want you to do, Sara."

"What? I'm doing a great job here, God!"

"That's not forgiveness, Sara."

"What do you mean that's not forgiveness. Just let me continue to work this out and I'll get there eventually. Give me a few more minutes. It's not instantaneous."

"That's NOT forgiveness."

Oh, crud. I get it now.

Sigh.

Colossians 3: 12-13

¹² Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts,kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, ¹³ bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

"Did you have anything good at ALL for Me to use as an excuse to forgive you? Did you in ANY way deserver the forgiveness I gave?" said my Father to me.

So often, we try to make ourselves forgive others by trying to realize their good intentions or by finding some grain of "good" in them that makes them possibly worthy of our forgiveness. The danger in that is that there will surely be a time when you can find no exchange for your forgiveness, no good in the one who has wronged you. Then, if you have only practiced forgiveness in this way, you will be stuck with growing bitterness inside your heart for the rest of your life. It will eat your insides out. It will take a part of you away and you will not be a fully functioning individual. You will have given Satan a foothold that he can enjoy and exploit.

Even when we CAN find that excuse to forgive, that's still not real forgiveness, so we shouldn't even bother.

God forgave me when there was nothing I could give Him. I had no redeeming qualities, but He redeemed me for Himself. I am called to forgive others even as He forgave me, not for their benefit, but for mine. God wants me to be free and my heart to be unfettered. He led by example and He also provides the power to follow.

Try it for yourself today.

In YMCA - M stands for Mud

2010-01-14T09:49:00.004-06:00

Here's the story...

I went to the Y at 5:30 for a step class. I took my keys, my wallet and Eden. I had a great class, got Eden and went to the car. I pulled out of my parking space and proceeded to go around a row of cars to get to the exit. Cars had parked all the way to the edge of the pavement and out on to some grass. I could see the grass had ruts and bumps, but I took it slow so as not to bump the nose of my car. I made it through the first "ditch" just fine and began slowly through the second. That's where all the trouble began. I never made it out. I did what you do before you realize you're stuck in mud and floored it. I made it to the crest of the mini hill and sank back down. I popped it in reverse. No luck. I turned the wheels, looking for a better direction to get out. No good. I reversed as far as I could go, quickly put it in drive and (brilliantly) used the kinetic energy to give my car the extra push it needed to make it through, over and out.

Yes!

Nope.

I had to leave my car stuck and get Eden out and walk back inside. Remember, I only have my wallet and keys. That means no phone. I use the Y's phone to call home. No answer. I then have to ask to use the personal cell phone of one of the employees to call Chuck's long distance cell number. He answers and says he'll be on his way soon.

He arrives with Arielle (who had been in the middle of eating) and tries to get my car unstuck. Meanwhile, Eden is continuously repeating "Mud. Mud. Mud? Stuck? Stuck in mud. Stuck in the mud. Car, mud. Mommy's car stuck in mud." It felt like she was rubbing it in. I was going loco.

Chuck didn't have any better time of it than I. We call AAA and settle inside the Y to wait an hour for the tow truck. Meanwhile, Arielle is getting anxious to eat the rest of her dinner and has also soaked through her diaper, pants, blanket and my sleeve... then she pooped. Eden hadn't eaten either, so Chuck drove to Wendy's for a kids meal of nuggets.

While we continue to wait and Eden begins her long-awaited meal. This very friendly woman begins chatting with us. Just basic stuff like what beautiful kids we have and remembering that she was 2 when her sister was born. Then she says "What are you having to eat sweetie? Oh, chicken nuggets, huh? You're going to get fat if you keep eating food like that."

Give us a break, lady! You have no idea what she eats normally and it's really none of your business anyway!

Then, even later, when the tow truck had come and Chuck was out with the towing man, she came back around and grabbed a cookbook off a table where it was displayed for purchase. She began showing the pictures to Eden and said "Oh, you probably won't recognize any of these vegetables, we'd better look at pictures of fruit." At that point, I felt the need to defend myself. Stupid, but oh well. So when she came to a picture of tomatoes I cut in quickly, "She LOVES tomatoes! You love tomatoes, don't you Eden!?" Of course, she just stared at me. Come on! Say, "Yummy, yummy!" or something to back Mommy up. Then we came to a page with broccoli. "Oh, broccoli Eden! another of your favorites! right?" No answer. The woman looked at me and said, "Really, she eats broccoli?" "Yep!"

I wanted to say, "Cross my heart and hope to die. She really does. I promise!" But I controlled myself.

Finally, Chuck came back in with the keys and we were all set to go.

I was super stressed out for the rest of the evening although very glad to be home. I won't be ready to go back to that Y for a few more days.

Yea For Sewing!

2010-01-02T21:16:00.004-06:00

I'm back at it. I actually found some time to hit the sewing machine and try out a brand new pattern I purchased with Christmas money. I discovered Heidi and Finn on Etsy.com. They have very reasonably priced, unique kids patterns. I bought the girly blouse pattern and the dressy coat with the bow. I made Eden a fall/winter version of the blouse from some denim I had left over from making her some ruffle-bottom jeans. (I don't have a good picture of the jeans yet... I'll post when I do.)

I took her out on the porch today to photograph the debut of the blouse and then we went to the mall. She got several compliments and I was so proud! :)

Catching my Breath

2009-12-31T13:24:00.003-06:00

I'm not only finding it difficult to get a moment for myself during the day, but I'm also finding it difficult to control myself... specifically, my emotions, my words and my tone toward my two-year-old.

This morning I woke up to her banging on her door whimpering because she had crawled out of her crib for the second morning in a row. I am NOT prepared for this. I have been sooooo happy lately with how the schedule is working out between Eden and Arielle in the mornings. If Arielle wakes first, fine, I feed her and then wait for Eden to wake up. (that is the rarest scenario, by the way) If Eden wakes first and I'm not ready to get up, she reaches through the slats in her crib to the wagon filled with books and reads to herself and sings, allowing me to lay in bed longer. Nice, huh? Then I can go get her and feed her breakfast. She watches an episode of Gospel Bill (a show I watched as a kid) while I change Arielle and feed her. Perfect.

Eden climbing/falling out of her crib and then crying and banging on the door, which, in turn, requires me to get up at whatever time it may be and also awakens Arielle is by no means ideal.

sigh. Not a great way to start the day.

After I opened her door, knelt down to her eye level, grabbed her shoulders and scolded her harshly for climbing out of her crib, I had a realization about that moment and about the day before.

See, yesterday, I must have raised my voice at her at least 10 times. She (in random order) yelled "No!" at me when asked to sit back in her carseat, refused to go to her room for a diaper change, asked me 30 billion questions loudly over the screaming of her baby sister, decided to somersault off the couch and consequently hit her head hard on the coffee table after being told not to climb on the couch, continuously kicked the foot rest on the stroller, touched or grabbed everything she was strolled past in the store, stuck her finger down Arielle's throat to try to stop her crying, wouldn't stay in her chair at dinner ... and the list of aggravations goes on. She seemed to be on some crazy drug yesterday and I seemed to turn into a big, awful monster of a mommy.

So, this morning, after I gave her a good shake, glare, and scolding. God shook me, right to my heart and it took my breath away. I was miserable. Instead of giving Eden breakfast, I sat in the chair in our den and cried. She was very concerned and came up to me and leaned on my lap and stroked my leg, which made me feel worse.

I have a HUGE responsibility here and I'm not living up to the task. I know God can help me and obviously He wants to because He got my attention this morning.

Ok God. You want a change, You're going to have to make it in me.

Lord, I give you my heart. I give you my soul. I live for You alone. Every breath that I take, every moment I'm awake, Lord, have Your way in me.

Christmas Thoughts

2009-12-13T10:53:00.004-06:00

I took a break from survival mode to pretend I didn't have a baby three weeks ago and stepped out for a little Christmas party with the Spousal Alliance of UMC. Chuck and I got dressed up for the first time since being parents of two and went to dinner with the group.

I decided to take some pictures when I got back to commemorate the event. Here's one.

This morning, I'm listening to Andy Stanley, pastor of North Point Community Church in Alpharetta, GA. He's talking about Christmas and the fact that Jesus had some shady characters in his family that He should have been embarrassed of, just like we all do. He's talking about the fact that Matthew included some strange choices in Jesus' geneology. He, as a despised tax collector, sinner, and overall despicable character, understood that the story of Jesus shouldn't be about associations with only admirable people. Jesus came from sinners and came to save sinners. God had come for those who needed a gift, not those who seemed perfect. The sinners like Tamar and Rahab, the awful mistake of David and Bathsheeba, the non-Jewish Ruth... they were all connected to Christ. Christ came to connect with sinners. Even the ones in your family... in my family... even me.

It's Been A While

2009-12-02T17:06:00.002-06:00

... so I thought I owed everyone some sort of post. I do not have the brain cells available to me to write anything lengthy, but I wanted to post something or other, just to say I have.

I am currently waiting for the gas company to come by, as we apparently have some sort of leak outside our house. A big thanks goes out to the postman for letting me know he smelled gas as he walked by.

Ok, the gas guy just showed up. He said he didn't detect anything or smell anything, so now I feel silly, but at least it's good news that there's no leak.

Chuck's back from a workout... I'll finish this tomorrow...

next day:

I'm trying out a new schedule today. Eden is still with my parents in Atlanta. We left her there after Thanksgiving so I could have a week or so back here with just Arielle to continue to recover before I had to take care of an infant and an almost two-year-old. I've been taking a nap in the mornings from 9-11am every day, which I would not be able to do with Eden here. So, today, I got up at 8am and I'm going to stay up until 1pm, when Eden normally naps. The trick will be to get Arielle to nap at that time too.

Right now she's being very fussy, so I guess it's a good thing that I'm not trying to take a morning nap today. I really dislike a crying baby. It's no fun. Especially when you can't seem to do anything to soothe.

I've been leaving the TV on most of the day to somewhat simulate the noise that Eden will bring with her when she returns home. Arielle was doing really great sleeping through her sister's shrieks while we were all in Atlanta, but I'm afraid she's getting spoiled with quiet this week.

I've had about all the crying I can take for now. I'd better get her out of her pack n' play.

Korres and E.L.F. Update

2009-11-13T11:54:00.003-06:00

Two new YouTube vids available!

Click here for the first where I tell you all about my first impressions of the Korres samples I got in the mail.

Click here for the end of the Korres sample video and a bit about my first introduction to E.L.F. products, which can be found at www.eyeslipsface.com, some Kmart stores and some Target stores.

She's the Best

2009-11-12T12:49:00.002-06:00

I don't really have anything to write here, so I thought I'd try to appease you with a couple pictures of Eden. Sorry, that's the best I've got.

Another Hair-Do

2009-11-05T22:58:00.003-06:00

I wanted to play a minute before I went to bed, so I redid my makeup and tried some things and then decided to try something with my hair. I've never been able to do (nor have I really tried that hard) a pony with a pouf. This is a Mississippi favorite, from what I can tell, and I wanted to see if I could make it work. I think it's a nice way to make your pony tail look more "on purpose" rather than an indication that you didn't really have the time or desire to do your hair that day. At least that's what a ponytail usually indicates on me.
How I did it:
I put it in a high ponytail with an elastic. - Tip for all ponytails: I hate getting that little bump below my ponytail, don't you? That can be avoided by tilting your head back while securing the elastic. Then, when you look straight ahead again, the hair underneath the ponytail is pulled tight. It helps. - Next, I took the handle of an eyeshadow brush (because I do not own a rat-tailed comb) and used it to lift the hair up around the crown of my head while holding onto the elastic with my other hand to make sure I didn't pull the whole ponytail around and loosen it on all sides. After doing this, I just had a little bit more voluminousness on the top, nothing special. So, I got out a headband with teeth and placed it just behind my bangs, pressing it securely on my scalp and pushed back, effectively raking the hair into a pouf closer to the ponytail.

The Color Purple

2009-11-04T21:00:00.005-06:00

I posted yet another video to YouTube. Y'all, this video began as a 25 minute long video!! I gab rediculously while filming myself, apparently. I had to edit out so much and I do really wish I could have been more concise so you could see the other lipglosses I talked about.
I wanted to share this because, once again, I am learning new things and I wanted to pass on what I'm learning, just in case there are other clueless souls out there like me when it comes to makeup. My latest discoveries are mixing lip colors, trying one new color family in particular and layering lipstick with lipgloss.
The other products not mentioned in the video that I had an opinion about are:

-Neutrogena MoistureShine lipglosses in Whisper and Groove.
I really liked the creamy texture of this gloss and did notice that I didn't need to reapply as often as expected. I don't know what they smell like... maybe some sort of healthy, grainy cereal like my mom and dad might have in their cabinet. I'm not a fan really. They have the typical "doe foot" applicator, which a lot of the makeup gurus seem to shun, but works just fine for me.
These two colors are on the lighter end of the spectrum and are very pretty in the tubes. I thought Whisper might make for a nice glossy nude lip, but ended up washing me out too much. It looks like I put concealer on my lips and then a clear gloss over it. Just didn't flatter me at all. I do find, though, that it's great for toning down brighter colors, making them more neutral and wearable.
Groove is a really beautiful soft pink, but I didn't feel like it looked a whole lot different than Whisper on my lips. (I'd like to wear that color, or paint it on a wall. It's really, really pretty) It does look nice paired with a pink blush, like my NARS Orgasm blush or my Bare Minerals True All Over Face Color to give the pink some oomph.

-Stila mini lipglaze set in Brown Sugar, Apricot and Starfruit
I have seen so much hype about these lipglazes on YouTube and jumped at the chance to get three for $8 from the Sephora website. I'm glad I didn't invest more in them. As far as I can tell, these are scented and each color smells different. I'm not opposed to any of them so far. They have a brush at one end and a rotating dial at the other that clicks as you push product into the brush. I tend to find product oozing from the brush (fortunately, there is a cap) when I return a day later for the next application. Not a great design for me.
Apricot and Starfruit are peach and pink respectively, but so sheer that I might as well be wearing a really sticky chapstick. Now, sometimes a sticky lipgloss is good, because it's not going to slide off your lips. Not really my preference though.
The Brown Sugar color does actually deposit color on my lips. I get a nice glossy... um... brown sugar color. It's very aptly named, I must say. I don't have any brownish lipcolor in my collection, so it's nice to have that option now, if I want it. I can see wearing it with bronzes, taupes and other neutrals for a nice look.

Watch here.

POW: Natural, Beneficial and Pretty

2009-11-04T15:18:00.006-06:00

I've been continuing to read and learn about the Korres brand of skincare and cosmetic products. I just can't get those few brief days where I was using the sample of the Wild Rose foundation out of my mind. I'm using my Laura Mercier foundation now, and I am enjoying it. It has good coverage, feels light, lasts all day and gives me a nice even complexion. I AM still concerned about some of the ingredients and wonder if I'm doing anything good for my skin, or just covering what I don't like about it.
The Korres website had a special offer where you can try 8 samples of their bath, body, and cosmetic products plus the three samples you get to choose with every order. I couldn't resist going ahead and getting the Wild Rose foundation as well as a couple of value sets for Christmas gifts to get free shipping. I'll be sure to review the sample products as I try them.
Here are a few of the things I learned about Korres in my research.

"Korres is committed to developing safe, effective and natural products by broadly avoiding synthetic components that can sum up to 30-60% of cosmetic formula, replacing them with greatly beneficial naturally derived ingredients. Korres' products are further enriched with active plant extracts."

"Having realized the overload of information and the level of misunderstanding surrounding natural ingredient based cosmetics, Korres sets new standards by allowing the product to educate consumers. Through the use of a clear & factual ingredient table, featured on the side of each product, Korres helps consumers make their choice in an honest and genuine customer-caring approach."

I really appreciate that. I'm trying my best here to use healthy products and they're assisting me in discovering if their product is a good choice for me.

"Korres’ skincare line is built upon the brand’s vast knowledge of herbal ingredients that stems from its origins as the oldest homeopathic pharmacy in Athens, Greece. With a repertoire of more than 3,000 herbal remedies, Korres selects the most effective natural ingredients—like wild rose, sugar, yogurt, thyme, honey, olive, and rye—for their unique ability to address specific skin concerns."

"As with all Korres' natural skincare and color products, the Wild Rose collection is formulated to achieve maximum, long-lasting results using highly effective, natural extracts. What you won't find: harsh chemicals and synthetic ingredients. What you will find: skin-friendly products loaded with wild rose oil. Rich in vitamin C, wild rose oil offers potent antioxidant protection and also works to fight fine lines and hyperpigmentation. It can even assist in cell regeneration and in improving skin texture. End result? Gorgeous skin with a natural glow."

These descriptions of the Korres history, commitment to natural ingredients and benefits come from the Korres website and the Sephora website. Can you believe that all the benefits of the Wild Rose skincare regimen are also found in their Wild Rose foundation, concealer and finishing powder?! That means that your makeup IS a skincare regimen. You put concealer under and around your eyes and you're treating your fine lines. You put foundation on and you're improving the quality and hydration of your skin. That is pretty cool.
Because it was developed in Greece, the color selection of the foundation is all made for skin with olive and yellow undertones. As I mentioned in a previous post, the foundation color definitely doesn't match the skin on my face, BUT, because my neck and arms are not as pale as my face, it blends once it's on. I also really enjoyed the way it cut the redness on my face and evened out my skin tone. Just imagine if my skin tone could get more even over time without any makeup on... because of using this makeup!

Baby Shower Gift

2009-10-31T22:12:00.007-05:00

Here's one of the other baby shower gifts that I had finished but couldn't post pictures of yet, for fear of spoiling the surprise. She already knows I was making a swaddler for her little boy, so it won't completely ruin it if she happens to check my blog between now and 2 pm tomorrow.

I decided to make a matching hat. Whether or not it will actually fit his little head, only time will tell. Looks cute just sitting there, though. :)
The swaddler is my own knock-off of one I saw on Etsy called the Pod.

The top can be folded down or not. The baby's arms can be inside or out. (My white fleece baby is demonstrating the arms tucked in.) And the bottom can be folded up for a fetal position or left out to allow baby's legs to kick.

The Uncomfortableness that is Halloween

2009-10-30T08:25:00.002-05:00

We didn't celebrate Halloween when I was growing up. I agree with the choice my parents made and I never missed the candy. When I was in grade school, our church had a "Hallelujah Night" and I remember playing games and dressing up as a princess or other non-scary character for a few years running.

Not only did I not know I was missing anything when I was little, I don't remember ever having to explain to friends why I didn't go from house to house threatening a trick if I wasn't given a treat. It was just what it was. My parents explained their reasoning to me, but I didn't really relay it to anyone else.

Now, as a parent, I realize how hard choices like that sometimes can be. Not only are you not doing what everyone else is, but explaining why (or just mentioning your inclination not to participate) can get very uncomfortable. After all, doesn't a particular choice on someone's part usually mean that they consider the other choice unacceptable and even wrong? Therefore, without saying it, I feel as though I am not only explaining my family's choice, but also condemning the person to whom I am speaking (assuming their choice is different from mine). Not to mention we are probably considered the fuddy-duddy family in our neighborhood for not passing out candy.

All that being said. I wasn't sure I even wanted to write this post... but my blog is about getting to know me. This is what's on my mind right now and is something that will be a part of me for years of Octobers to come. I found a pretty concise explanation on the K-Love webpage that explains more of my reasoning if you're interested. You can read it here.

Oh geez. Butterfly Kisses just came on. Excuse me, but I HAVE to change it before I start bawling...

POW

2009-10-28T13:22:00.006-05:00

My Pick of the Week this week is adorable girl clothing. I have discovered and fallen in love with boutique clothing and all the fun fabrics and patterns that go along with it. I have to say that, although I oooh and aaaah at the pictures of these cute little girls modeling this cute, cute clothing, I don't think I could really dress my girls like this every day in real life (even if the budget allowed it... which it most definitely does NOT). I think these looks are pretty over-the-top, but still fun to look at and glean ideas from.

This beautiful creation is from the Lily and Ebony Etsy shop. The bright colors really appeal to

me. Somehow, the dress still seems very casual and wearable even with all the ruffles (you can't see in this pic, but there are ruffles all down the back). Maybe it's just the casual stance of the model... Oh, and I love that cute pocket too. You can have this little treasure all for yourself for the eye-popping price of $149.00.

Did I mention the budget was restrictive?

Isn't this lovely? I love the color choices, the simplicity of the design and the extra detail of the

sash. You already know I am loving sashes. This is from the Momi Boutique Etsy shop and is priced at a very reasonable (only in comparison) $40 for the dress and $27 for the pants.

If you're like me (provided you're a woman) you might be thinking, I know I'm too old to wear that stuff, right?? but I WANT to anyway. I wonder if a ruffle pant would look silly... Would it be unacceptable to wear a pillowcase top? Well, here's your, our, answer. Boutique Mia by CXV on Etsy. They offer pillowcase tops, dresses and, yes, even ruffle pants for women. This is one of my favorites in their line. It's a simple, elastic top, strapless a-line dress with a ribbon for waist definition. It's *cough, cough* $64... but wait... look at this versatility!

Wear it as a high-waisted a-line skirt with a sash and voila! a new level of sophistication and a dress that can be worn in every season. I love it. And one day... I'm going to make it. You just wait.

Asymmetrical Debut

2009-10-23T13:10:00.003-05:00

Here it is! my new asymmetrical haircut. She just cleaned up the ends, so I still have the same layers as before and she shortened the back a bit so that the angled cut would still work with my hair longer like it is now.

Do you like it? huh? Isn't it just the right amount of interesting? If you live in or near Jackson and you are looking for an awesome hairdresser, go see Heather at Noggins!

You looooove it. Muah! I can tell...

My Little Monkey

2009-10-21T17:32:00.002-05:00

Haircut

2009-10-20T14:00:00.004-05:00

I'm getting a haircut in two days and in an effort to still have something fun and unique in the way of a hairstyle while I grow it out (once again), I've been scouring the net looking for medium length styles. I ran across a really nice look modeled by Gwyneth Paltrow. I've never really been a fan of her long limp locks, but I think she really did a great thing here and jazzed it up a bit with some waves and a bit of asymmetry.

Ever since I was little, my mom instilled in me a perfectionists heart that can really get me in trouble sometimes. That perfectionism extended to hairstyling as well. Mom used to be a hairdresser, so she cut, permed, colored and styled my hair as I was growing up. Yes, permed. I grew up in the 80's people and she did her best to keep me stylish. Failed miserably, but did her best.

During college, I remember deciding not to use a comb to perfectly part my hair one day. I'd always made sure in the past that each hair was on it's own correct side of the part. No single hair mussing up the straight line of scalp. This gets especially tricky with hairstyles parted all the way down the back. I would often devote more time in the mornings to doing my hair before dance class if I intended to do two "Princess Leia" buns or two braids, or other center parted updos (which I used to break up the monotony of the single bun chosen most often by dancers).
I felt daring and even naughty for not bothering to make sure each hair was perfectly placed that day. From that time on, I stopped being so meticulous about my parts and just let my hair fall naturally where it liked. I found it freeing. :) It's still hard for me to totally give in to the trend of the "messy" updo, or to not take the time to make sure each curl has the same spring as the others when using a curling iron to style my hair.

So, with a background like this, you can surmise that getting an asymmetrical cut is not in my nature. I think the nice thing about this one is that it's not too obvious and you could emphasize or de-emphasize it depending on your mood. I want options people! There just aren't that many when you're trying to grow your hair out. We'll see what I end up with on Thursday. I'll post a pic, of course, so you can see too.

My Life in General

2009-10-18T14:32:00.004-05:00

At the moment, I feel like I've got quite a few different trains of thought all running on different tracks through my brain. Often their dischordant "ca-lack, ca-lack" ing and "chuga-chuga-choo" ing keeps me up at night.
I feel like I've become somewhat of a different person during the course of this pregnancy. It's like I've had a new awakening to creating, crafting, sewing, fashion and makeup. I'm afraid I can't really say that I've grown into a different person spiritually, although God's definitely working on me... just no drastic changes yet. And I can't say that I've grown into the kind of housewife and mom that I really want to be. I've just changed in superficial areas. sigh. I guess those superficial areas are still part of me and it's ok for that part of me to evolve.
Anyway, back to those trains. One of them is totally dedicated to ideas about house organization, a place for everything and... you know the rest. I want to organize the storage room, declutter the hall closets, actually create a sewing nook with places to put projects and fabric and patterns and tools.
Another train is all about continuing to decorate the house. I have sooooo many ideas and projects in my head. Paint the hall. Draw more artwork with a gold paint pen in our bedroom. Pick some pictures from my parent's trip to Italy to blow up, frame and hang in the guest bedroom, Prod my aunt about the magnolia painting I commissioned from her a while back to hang in the living room. Get vinyl wall lettering for the living room and the master. Paint a decorative flower/scroll pattern on the living room wall across from the accent wall in the dining room. Replace the old, dingy fabric in the doors of the buffet with new fabric. I could really go on and on....
The third train charges through my brain with sewing projects galore. I have at least 4 unfinished projects waiting right now and three more that MUST be completed before Arielle arrives. Then there's all the stuff I want to make that's not necessary, just a want.
A couple days ago, the Christmas train arrived. It's really a conglomeration, hauling cars from almost all the other trains. I'm thinking of how I'd like my house to look this Christmas, what I could craft for presents and what I need to do relating to Christmas before the baby gets here that I might not be able to/want to afterwards.
Of course, you all know about this new makeup train that just rolled on in not that long ago and now I can't stop wanting to learn all about brands, ingredients, tips and techniques. It's a big, loud train. Sephora has become a weekly haunt as I find new products on YouTube that I want to try for myself. I'm really surprised the sales people don't recognize me... maybe they do and just don't let on. I mean, how many other red-haired, extremely pregnant women with cute little blonde-haired toddlers come in there?

I went in today to try the Korres Wild Rose Foundation and the Tarte Cheek Stain stick thingy. Seriously, I am now totally in love with both of these products. I already ordered my Laura Mercier foundation from Ebay, but after that's used, Korres' foundation is probably next in line. I didn't even know about this brand a week ago. But it's really everything I want in a foundation. Their products are on Sephoras "green" list because they are formulated without mineral oil, parabens, sulfates, synthetic fragrances etc. It's a brightening foundation (not matte and not dewy) with great coverage and buildability. The only possible downside is the SPF 20, but now that I'm using a primer, that should cut the risk of blemishes.
And this foundation (from reading the reviews on Sephora's site and elsewhere) actually improves peoples' skin the more they wear it. Ladies are talking about their skin looking better and better every time they wash the makeup off. How's that for a perk? Although it's color formulations are limited (only six shades to choose from) and they are really more olive based, whereas I'm ruddy, I think my skin has never looked better than it does with the Wild Rose Foundation I have on today. The Sephora rep made me a sample to take home and I'm really looking forward to trying it again tomorrow and seeing if I still love it as much as I do today. Other big plus to Korres? Their foundation is $28 compared to Laura Mercier's $42. Nice.

Arielle's Christmas Dress

2009-10-17T14:33:00.002-05:00

Here's the mini version of the dress I made for Eden. I love the idea of matching sisters!

Makeup Time Again

2009-10-16T20:36:00.003-05:00

I thought I'd do a video on my current faves and some new stuff I've tried that I like and some that doesn't really work for me. There are a couple of bargain hunter drugstore finds and a couple of application tips too.
I posted on YouTube again. You can watch here.

And, random thought of late... I want to get hair extensions, not in a salon, just off a rack. I've said that before, but I'm really curious if anyone who was not a professional hairstylist and just bought the Jessica Simpson ones could really put them in and look natural. I've seen videos and it doesn't look that hard. Just seems like the perfect solution to my hair desires. I like it short because I feel like I have more of an individual style, but I like the option of long hair (I've always idolized Aurora from Sleeping Beauty) and all the updo opportunities that come with it. I also would love to be able to do some highlights or lowlights, but I'm not about to shell out $50 or more every month for maintainance. Hair extensions (reasonable length ones, not down to my butt or anything) seem like a possible solution. hmmmm.

Finally!

2009-10-10T20:35:00.003-05:00

Something that turned out right the first time! Sewing is MUCH more enjoyable when I follow a pattern (an easy one that includes step by step instructions with photos) and just take things slowly. Talking to myself while I work seems to help to. :)

I used the Peasant Top/Dress pattern from Whimsy Couture and added the sash with the flower. I'm loving the sash idea and I've seen it a lot. It's a nice option to make the dress something special and you can use the flower or not (it's on a clip) and you can tie it in the back or the front, in a bow or a knot... so versatile!

I have a couple of options for Eden to wear for Christmas, but I really wanted to make her a dress myself.

So I did it. And now that I've done one, I'm not as scared to try to make Arielle's.

Gotta Love a Deal

2009-10-07T08:09:00.002-05:00

I always get excited about saving money... not the kind of saving money where you don't spend any at all, but the kind where you spend less than you thought you might have to.

I've been Ebay hunting and I discovered a listing about 3 days ago for the Laura Mercier foundation that matched my skin so well. It goes for $42 full price and this listing began the bidding at 99 cents. (is there really no cents sign on my keyboard? hmmm) I was the first bidder and the only bidder for 2 of the 3 days. Needless to say, I was getting very excited about getting it for $4 including shipping. Then the inevitable happened and someone else bid $10. My cap was $14.50 because that's about all that's left in my part of the budget this month, so I went for it, afraid I would forget to be in front of my computer in the last few minutes of bidding. Apparently the other bidder wasn't interested in paying more than that either because I won it! $17.50 total for a $42 product. Yea! That's almost like buying a "high-end" drugstore brand like Physician's Formula.

Being Someone Else

2009-10-05T12:57:00.006-05:00

Here's today's hair experiment. I watched a bunch of YouTube videos on hairstyling last night and got inspired to try something new. I never ever tease, but It makes hair much more interesting. I think that my side-swept

pouf is a bit too "perfect" and therefore looking dated. I don't know what era, but it's not looking "rocker girl" like I envisioned. maybe it's the choice of adornment that's adding to lack of modernity...

Anyway, I decided to try and wear this out and I felt very much stared at and very much not myself. But it was kind-of fun to be someone else for a while, whoever else it is that would do their hair like this. :)

All By Myself

2009-10-04T11:49:00.005-05:00

I don't know how I can get some really good lighting but here's a picture of me with my own take on a make up look using some of the things I learned from my makeovers. I'm sad you can't see it very well, but I'll tell you what I used anyway.

I primed my face with the oil-free primer sample from Lorac I got with my Sephora order. Then I used some of my Arbonne liquid foundation in shade 1C. Unfortunately, this foundation is SPF 8 and I'm trying not to use SPF on my face for a couple of weeks to see if it helps my acne issues, but maybe having the primer on my face first will protect it. ??? I then used my BareMinerals powder foundation as a concealer around my eyes, and nose and all over my eye lids as a base for shadow and liner. I used a drugstore brow pencil in an auburn shade to define my brows. I decided to go with the more dramatic MAC eyeliner look on the lid using a drugstore brown liquid liner. I used Queen Phyllis (my daily sandard) shimmery gold powder shadow from BareMinerals on my lid and tear ducts and then accented with a blue-green color called Freedom on my lower lash line. I used the NARS blush/bronzer duo for my cheek color and contour and finished it off with BareMinerals Buxom lip gloss in Bunny.

We went out to see an air show earlier today and there was definitely some dewiness involved (that's the girl term for sweating), but my makeup really lasted. This picture was taken at the end of the day and probably the only thing that needed touching up was my lip gloss. I'm really noticing the difference of using a primer. Not only does my makeup have more staying power, but I'm having to use less to cover.

Onward in my makeup adventures.

Talent

2009-10-03T21:07:00.004-05:00

I promised that by the end of the week, I would make a post about some "deep thoughts" I've had. It's only a few more hours until the end of the week, so I'd better get crackin'.

We went to a different church on Sunday. We attended a Vineyard church in Augusta and thought we'd probably want something different here in Jackson, but the familiar is easy and comfortable. We tried the Jackson Vineyard this past week and, boy was it a great week to go! I'm so, so happy we visited. This may not become our new church, but we were really blessed by this Sunday's service.

They had a guest speaker, but even before he spoke, I was impressed by the pastor's (I'm assuming he was the pastor) opening prayer. He prayed that we would show Jesus to the people we saw through the week and that we would seek boldness from the Holy Spirit to share Jesus with those whose paths crossed ours. Boldness... good stuff.

Worship was very lively. There were lots of people, men and women, raising their hands. There were also a couple ladies dancing on one side in the front and a young girl with some flags on the other side. I like to see that, of course. The "skit," as the pastor called it, was a duet of the two dancers I had noticed earlier in worship.

Everyone was dressed VERY casually. There was a whole troop of bikers and the congregation seemed generally to be lower to middle class... just judging from the cars in the parking lot... um... and by the haircuts and fashion choices.

I have to be totally honest here and say that I felt like I really didn't fit in. I had to confront my snootiness (snootiness I didn't even know I had!) and realize that it would probably be really good for me to get out of my own "class" and mingle with people that aren't exactly like me. Huh, imagine that.

Now I'd like to share the main thing I took from what the speaker said. He was a former member of a band called Muscle Shoals Rhythm Section aka The Swampers. He had a radical conversion experience and now plays his guitar for Christ and speaks. He used to pastor a church as well. The first thing that struck me was how he could play guitar, and play well, and I felt drawn to worship, directed to worship. I grew up with parents that were uncomfortable with guitar solos during worship. Something about guitar and it's relation to rock music, which they don't care for... They were just always distracted by a guitar solo. The felt like it detracted from worship and brought focus to the musician. I, by default, have had the same discomfort in the past.

I think I posted here about the minister who came to Christ Life a couple of times and ministered with singing before he preached. I was just uncomfortable with that, but then I had to ask myself why it would be different to dance to direct the congregation toward worship. I didn't have an answer, but all I knew is that I felt like his singing performance did, in fact, detract from worship and make me focus more on him.

So, same question here. Why was it any different for him to play his guitar for us (for God really) than for me or others to dance a performance? Well, in this case, I didn't feel it was any different at all. I wasn't made uncomfortable by his playing. It brought me toward God and I was able to appreciate the talent God had given him and be inspired by the fact that he was using his abilities to honor the One Who had provided them.

He said, in between songs, that he used to play only mediocre guitar in church settings when he first got saved because he was afraid of just what I've been talking about my parents and I feeling. But then he thought "Why should I play worse for Jesus than I did for the Devil!?" I thought that was a really great "aha" moment. That's just so true. He went on to say that to waste or diminish his talent didn't make sense, ESPECIALLY in a setting of worshiping his Creator. That clicked for me.

All that being said, I think that there is a very present temptation and danger of slipping into self-promoting performance. But I totally think that if your heart is fully towards worship that using your talents with excellence and sharing them in the corporate worship setting is completely acceptable. It's all about your heart.

He said a lot of other really great things, so many nuggets that were worthy of an audible "That's right!" from me.

God is so good. We were both so glad to have the chance to be blessed by Him and that guest speaker.

MAC Makeover

2009-10-03T14:22:00.006-05:00

Back to YouTube again. Blogger doesn't like my videos apparently.

My MAC experience was very different from my Laura Mercier experience. I really appreciated the consultant being honest with me about her opinion of MAC's products, but what she had to say pretty much let me know that I didn't need to be using them. There's soooo much buzz on YouTube about MAC cosmetics. They seem to be somewhat of a standard of comparison for other cosmetics, so I just assumed they were awesome. Not for me.

Check it out if you're curious.

Impromptu Laura Mercier Makeover

2009-10-01T20:48:00.007-05:00

I'd like to share with everyone the results of my free makeover at the Laura Mercier makeup counter in Maison Weiss. I do tend to babble on (I've really got to work on that), but if you've got 12 minutes, you might learn a tip or two about makeup. I thought I knew how to do my makeup well, but the makeup artist did some things with me today and told me some things that I would have never known otherwise.

I also mention my awesome new glasses and my awesome 40's inspired 'do. :) Totally unrelated, but... I knew you were dying to feel totally up to date on my life in the minutest detail. right?

I couldn't get it to upload here this time, so it's on YouTube here. Scratch that... My rambling on got me in trouble. YouTube vids must be 10 min. or shorter apparently. I'm going back in to re-edit.

Ok, now I've done it. Here is the link, for real.

My First Review

2009-09-29T17:38:00.003-05:00

Here's my thoughts/review on the goodies I got in my Sephora box. I've been watching all these makeup reviews and tutorials on YouTube and, although, I do not aspire to have my own channel and do this regularly, I thought it would be fun to try it out while Eden was in "playpen time." With a lot of editing, I still ended up with less then succinct descriptions.

(There is a small blip where I'm talking about the Hope In A Tube product, where my laptop took a little nap and the video cuts out. It's an "eye and lip firming creme"... that's what I tried to say.)

Just for Me

2009-09-27T15:04:00.003-05:00

I got some belated birthday money from my father-in-law a couple of weeks ago and I spent it all in the last week on some stuff just for fun. I wanted to share, because I'm excited. I'll tell you what I got and I'll try to give you an update as I use each item. Is this blog getting frou-frou or what? Oh well, I have some deep thoughts I want to write about that I'll get to this week...

My birthday splurges included 6 patterns from WhimsyCouture on Etsy. I got a toddler pants pattern with options for ruffled bottoms, a knot dress pattern, I shirred bodice dress pattern, a ruffle skirt/twirl dress pattern, a criss-cross pinafore top pattern and a peasant top/dress pattern. I figure with those patterns and making a few variations here and there on my own, I should be able to make LOTS of different looks for my two girls... and maybe me as well. I've cut out fabric pieces for two of the patterns already, but haven't started sewing.

I also ordered some makeup and perfume from Sephora. I am constantly looking for THE perfect perfume. I want a signature scent that both I and my husband really love that I can wear for years and be known by. The problem is that I like variety. I don't like having the same haircut, the same makeup colors or the same perfume for very long. There's just too many other options to try and I don't want to miss out. The other problem is that there hasn't really been anything that Chuck has really gone ga-ga for. I want to wear something that will make him swoon, in a manly way. He likes everything I wear, but he just says "That smells good." or "That smells nice." I want him to say "Mmmmm, what is THAT!? You smell positively delicious!" ... or whatever the manly version of that would be.

When I look for scents to try on, I usually look for citrus, not flowers. He always turns up his nose at flowery scents. Unfortunately, those are usually the ones I really love. I came across a scent recently by Philosophy called Falling In Love, tried it on, enjoyed it, let him smell me when he got home and got a pretty decent reaction. He sniffed, leaned away and then leaned back in for another, longer sniff. I kept spritzing it on every few days whenever Eden and I were at or near a place that carried it and he kept giving the same sort-of double take (double smell?) reaction that showed it had piqued his interest. It's a blend of vanilla, florals and berries that neither of us probably would have bothered to sniff if we'd seen the description first.

All that to say, I ordered some from Sephora, as well as a blusher/bronzer duo from Nars in a very embarassing color name. It's apparently (I've learned very recently) the color Nars is known for, their signature color that's supposed to be universally flattering and give a natural flushed glow to the cheeks. What can I say? I'm curious. It came in a set with the bronzer (I don't have a bronzer) and the matching nail polish.

As an added bonus, I'm getting the 3 free samples that come with Sephora orders. Two out of the three, I didn't really care about, but the one I'm really curious to try is a primer. I've never used a make-up primer, never even thought about it, but maybe this will save me re-applying halfway through the day. I also found a code online for a free Philosophy Miracle Worker Skin Care set worth $65. I'm excited to try it because they create their formulas without mineral oil, parabens, pthalates and other yucky stuff. The absence of yuckiness is why I've been using Arbonne for my facial care, but I'm considering not renewing my consultant status this coming June because there are so many other options out there now that are similarly priced that seem equally free of yuck.

It all arrives tomorrow! I'll give my own version of a review after I've tried them out.

New Favorite

2009-09-25T10:25:00.003-05:00

Being able to make things for baby shower gifts.

I've made hair bows, two outfits, a matching swaddler and hat and, most recently a burp cloth which will become a set as soon as I make the second one. I have plans to make another burp cloth set and some more hair bows for another shower in November.

You've seen pictures of the two outfits, but I can't post pictures of the swaddler/hat set because I haven't given them yet. I can't post pictures of the burp cloths, because the others I plan to make will be from the same fabric and that would spoil that gift too.

Sorry to leave you hanging. I'll post them eventually.

Pick of the Week

2009-09-23T17:58:00.004-05:00

It's back! (at least for this Wednesday)

My pick for this week is something I want, but have absolutely no reason to get because I would never actually use/wear it. These tiny creations are just too stinkin' cute not to want anyway!

These are from OneElf's Etsy shop. I'm so impressed with her mixture of realism and irresistible cuteness.

Take, for example, these earrings. Don't cha just wanna lick 'em? These make me wish I was 8 years old again. I'd be the hippest 8 year old... and every other girl in 3rd grade would wish they had rainbow popsicle earrings like me.

And then there's the grilled cheese pendant. It looks so packed with buttery-toasted-yumminess that it's making me wonder what I could possibly wear it with. If I wanted to publicly declare my undying love for grilled cheese, this would be the perfect way to do it.

Now these... these are just delightful. Of course, I may be a little partial because I crave all thinks sweet and full of carbs, but these make me want to try to knit again, just so I have a reason to use these cutesy stitch markers. Something like these, one could just get personal enjoyment from and not worry about if someone else thought they were trying to be 8 years old again.

I Love Color

2009-09-23T17:28:00.005-05:00

...but it's a bit overwhelming to be picking paint colors for our house exterior. It's very intimidating. Maybe if I knew we were staying here for a while, I wouldn't be quite as concerned, but I know we need to sell in a little less than four years. I've watched enough HGTV to know that neutrals sell houses, but I don't want to just throw in the towel and settle for "Utterly Beige" or, even better, "Greige." I want some interest, some character, if I'm going to have the chance to pick my house color. I mean, how often do you really get to do that?

Oh the POWER.

Oh the responsibility...

We went to Sherwin Williams two days ago to pick up some paint chips and I found some colors I really like. The color combination I liked the most was complimented, but then shot down by the painter when he came to give an estimate. I picked this really beautiful brown with muted aqua shutters and a creamy color for the trim. He said the colors looked very nice together, but the brown might be too dark on the whole house, which is what Chuck was afraid of. He said it might look depressing to buyers. I thought it would look sophisticated. All the other houses near us are various tones of grey, tan and beige and I do not want ours to look the same as every other house.

Now I'm considering the idea of painting the cedar shake (about 1/5 of the front of our house and 1/3 of the back) the velvety brown and the brick a lighter shade from the same paint swatch. That way, I get my interesting color, but I don't have to be as concerned about putting buyers off because the majority of the house would be the lighter (read - more boring) color. I can still get some personality in there with the aqua shutters and hopefully stand out in a good way with the only house in our neighborhood to have a two-tone exterior.

I'll keep you posted.

Priorities

2009-09-20T10:13:00.003-05:00

This was way too good not to repost and it expresses what God's been laying on my heart every so often. He just keeps coming back around and working on me a little bit more. Same subject matter. Same suggestions. One day, I'll get it.

This is from Ali at A Cup of Cold Water. You can find the link to her honest thoughts about God and her family life at the link at the bottom of this page.

"Do you ever feel uncool? Like everyone in the world is cooler than you? More popular
than you? Being used by God in ways that you would NEVER be used? I need to get in the Word. I'll tell you what. How long, Oh, Lord, will I be in the 6th grade? How long will I long for You to mold me into something that I am not? How long will I look on with envy that you have gifted others in ways that You have not gifted me. How long will I be sad that I don't sew, or monogram things...or want to? How long? How long will I want to spend time with people that I don't have anything in common with? How long will I scoff at the life and talents and mercies you have so freely poured out on me? How long? Until I spend time with You, You say. Until I value Your Word more than I value 20 minutes of extra sleep? Until I seek Your will alone, rather than my own. Then, You say, and ONLY then will I be satisfied. Then, and only then, will I look at where the boundary lines have fallen and declare them to be so good...so pleasing...so perfect. Oh, Father, won't you captivate my heart again. Won't You please satisfy me in the morning with Your unfailing love. I'm not all that...but to Christ...ahh...but because of Christ..."

Humbling Revelations

2009-09-07T21:02:00.004-05:00

It's hard to learn about yourself. Most of the time, when you learn something about yourself, it seems to be uncomfortable and unsavory. The sermon Sunday was about growing and putting the past behind. The pastor said that he would take someone telling him he hadn't changed a bit since high school as an insult. I can see that. I'm definitely a different person and something would be very wrong if I wasn't. Hopefully, I'm different because God's growing me. Hopefully, I can respond to the things He reveals to me about myself with a determination to continue to conform to His image. Isn't it great that He doesn't show us everything ugly about us all at once? Sometimes, it's pretty embarrassing to have been oblivious to certain flaws for so long, but He knows when I'm ready to change. Things like that should make me more gracious to others who have (in my eyes) obvious flaws that they don't seem to be working on. Hello! they see the same in me.

It's so amazing that God can be so loving with us all and knows exactly when we're ready to be receptive to His leading to change. He doesn't look at us with disdain or disgust as we continue to stumble around and make messes without even realizing it. He just waits for the perfect time. He knows us intimately and still wants to know us. He loves us. That's just amazing. I'm amazed and humbled. Hopefully, I can stay that way for a while.

Baby Lucas Spoiler

2009-09-01T18:23:00.005-05:00

For some reason posting a picture gives me some amount of closure and satisfaction to what is otherwise a pretty stressful event... sewing. It's probably my own fault that it's stressful. I take on patterns and tutorials that are above my abilities and training.... um, what training? That's the other part of the problem, no idea what i'm really doing. I know how to thread my machine and to change the thread color to match my project. I know that turning the switch on the side sends the electricity to it so that when I push the pedal the needle goes up and down. I can pick the straight stitch or the zig-zag stitch by turning a dial to match the picture of the stitch I want. (by the way, I just kind-of eenie, meenie, minee, moe it when it comes to picking the stitch) The last problem is choosing to try to make things purely by sight. By that, I mean with no pattern whatsoever, just eyeing it. I look at a garment and say, "hmm, that looks simple enough" and then I try to cut out fabric pieces that look like they might make that garment when stitched together.

It's pretty absurd really... and very stressful.

Why do I do that!? I really have no idea what continues to compel me. I think that I forget (like having a baby) the pain of the last project and think it will really be a fun adventure this time. And parts of it are thrilling. And parts of it are fun. And parts of it are.... grrr.

I had to finish this outfit by Friday because we're bringing it to Atlanta with us to give to our friends for their new baby Lucas. Chuck took Eden out for a bit (because all the above risk factors are only compounded by a toddler in the sewing room) and I finally finished it. Mostly. I still have to put elastic in the pants, but that's easy. No, really, I can usually handle that without messing it up. Although I DID mess it up not too long ago. I sewed the two ends of the elastic together not realizing that it had twisted in it's travels through the waistband. I'll try not to make that mistake this time.

Sterling and Topaz

Competition

Christmas is Coming

A Wise Woman Builds Her Home

From Scratch

White, Fluffy, Bearded Lies

Wassail

Lit. Revisited

Hydrangeas

Tale of a Tailor

Real Simple

A First

Cute or Corrupt?

Job Hunt - The Memories

Love

I Wish

Quite the Opposite

It's a No Go

Goings On

Not a Kid Anymore

Homo H8?

Losing It : The Trend Continues

Vacation Anyone?

More of Me

Another One?!

On a Lighter Note

My Much-ness

3 Dollar Fancies

Hippie Bow-chic

SWAGGER WAGON

The Final Countdown, pt. 2

The Final Countdown

In Honor of Mother's Day

Quick Note on Tutorials

All Types of Ladies

The Matrix of the Heart

Favorite Friday

A Hostess at Heart...

Wishful Wednesday

New Clothes!

Favorite Friday

Wishful Wednesday

It's About Faith

Parents' Beware

Wishful Wednesday

Random. Random

N.M.M.

Flowers In Her Hair

Next Stop on the Makeup and Skin Care Train...

A Trio of Twos

Favorite Friday

Wishful Wednesday

N.M.M.

Bravery + Determination = .... We'll See

Favorite Friday

It'sa me, Mario!

Wishful Wednesday

Vlogger, Blogger... whatever

It's Amazing...

N.M.M.

Favorite Friday

The DIY Dish

N.M.M. addendum

Love equals War

Ephesians 6:12

Ephesians 4:26

N.M.M.

Forgiveness

In YMCA - M stands for Mud

More Videos Posted!

Yea For Sewing!

Catching my Breath

Christmas Thoughts

It's Been A While

Korres and E.L.F. Update

She's the Best

Another Hair-Do

The Color Purple

POW: Natural, Beneficial and Pretty

Baby Shower Gift